you know, just now as i was teman-ing fatimah solat asar, as i was leaning on the table, looking out the window, i said softly to myself, "why am i doing this?" as i gazed at the leaves of the trees, i asked myself again, "why am i doing this?" after she finished praying and we walked down the stairs to the canteen, that question disappeared again into the mist. then, as i was waiting for the bus, fidgety and anxious to get home, i repeated to myself, "why am i doing this?"
i couldnt convince myself of the right answer. i couldnt invoke the deep thinker in me.
i've realised this for quite some time now: that i'm always engulfed in the rush, in the technicalities, in the frustrations.. i keep forgetting to see beyond the sphere of work that eats up my energy, my time. i keep forgetting to reflect, to renew my niyyah, to always have faith and to work with a clear objective in mind. i keep forgetting the purpose of it all.. it seems that i'm always short-sighted.
i notice that i don't give enough time to sit down, to ponder and wonder about this. i need to do some soul-searching.
i need to get out. May Allah grant me the time, the money, the opportunity. may Allah ease my plan.
i can choose to stop and not be bothered, but my better half says that i must go out and give.
still trying to figure out..
can anyone lend me $800?????
i wanna buy a laptop.
haha.
but seriously ah, geram je tgk the deals offered at gumtree singapore.
got this HP Pavilion laptop dv4-1104TU at $800~
there's also Fujitsu E8410 at $850~
Lenovo S10 at $600~ wait, is this a mini? errr.. kite kurang minat mini notebooks~
and yang paling tempting: Sony Vaio VGN-CR353 at $1,100.
i know nuts about specifications, but, can always ask my brother or other brothers.
hmmm... dalam mimpi je lah eh, liyana.
earn your own money first, then can buy a laptop, alright?
*sighs and nods head slowly*
i wanna buy a laptop.
haha.
but seriously ah, geram je tgk the deals offered at gumtree singapore.
got this HP Pavilion laptop dv4-1104TU at $800~
there's also Fujitsu E8410 at $850~
Lenovo S10 at $600~ wait, is this a mini? errr.. kite kurang minat mini notebooks~
and yang paling tempting: Sony Vaio VGN-CR353 at $1,100.
i know nuts about specifications, but, can always ask my brother or other brothers.
hmmm... dalam mimpi je lah eh, liyana.
earn your own money first, then can buy a laptop, alright?
*sighs and nods head slowly*
Ada Apa Dengan Facebook?
siang tadi, pukul 3 lebih, i checked my mail. okay, semua emel dah clear.
sepuluh minit yang lalu, checked again. haa..? 34 new messages..???
ku pikir emel-emel baru tu mungkin yang penting2.. atau yang bernas2.. ada isi. ku picit tab 'Inbox'.
oh laaaaa.... rupe2nye notification that si fulan "tagged/commented on a photo of you". aiseyman.. banyak sgt! macam menyemak lah pulak.
hmmm... sejak beberapa hari nih, ade je emel yang bertajuk "-- added you as a friend on facebook". ye, saye ade facebook account. tapi klw awak tak add saye pon tak rugi (heh), sebab saya tak gunekan (or rather, belom gunekan) ape2 kemudahan/applikasi yang ade kat situ.
conclusion: i dont understand why people semangat nah dgn facebook. -_-"
sepuluh minit yang lalu, checked again. haa..? 34 new messages..???
ku pikir emel-emel baru tu mungkin yang penting2.. atau yang bernas2.. ada isi. ku picit tab 'Inbox'.
oh laaaaa.... rupe2nye notification that si fulan "tagged/commented on a photo of you". aiseyman.. banyak sgt! macam menyemak lah pulak.
hmmm... sejak beberapa hari nih, ade je emel yang bertajuk "-- added you as a friend on facebook". ye, saye ade facebook account. tapi klw awak tak add saye pon tak rugi (heh), sebab saya tak gunekan (or rather, belom gunekan) ape2 kemudahan/applikasi yang ade kat situ.
conclusion: i dont understand why people semangat nah dgn facebook. -_-"
found :)
Last Friday, hati ni tergerak nak gi KPR. selama ni, pernah dengar dari marl, mus, kak maryam.. so, memandangkan hari tu last day exam, jadi konon2 nak 'celebrate' habis2an (mcm betOl je eh), i tot to myself, jom ah gi!
sampai ghufran around 7pm gitu.. after solat maghrib then we made our way to the classroom. someone was already there. immediately after i salam-ed her, a sense of familiarity struck me. a name was forming in my head..
"what's your name?"
"sekolah mana..?"
"were you from alsagoff..?"
indeed! she is the Yasmin, my classmate wayyyy back in primary level. Yasmin Hamzah.. she transferred to another madrasah when she was in primary 3 gitu..
masyaAllah...! what a coincidence.. what a coincidence. k, i need not explain further how i felt. im sure you've read my previous posts about meeting people whom i've not seen for a loOng time.
primary 2 or 3 kot
from the left --
1. Shahriza, is it? i forgot her name.. she also left the school some time during the primary school days.. but i know she has an elder sister who has bulu mata yang lentik and suka cubit hidayah johari.. sebab hidayah johari ade bulu mata lentik jugak. hehe.. i've no idea how to find her.. :(
2. Yasmin! yeah, i remember her as a short, quiet girl.. suara serak2 basah. sekarang.. lebih tinggi dari kite kot.
3. Hafizah Sariupua. alhamdulillah... both of us stayed on til sec 4. altho we didnt graduate the same year. oh yes, she is tallll.. macam syarafina jugak. and sweet, too :)
4. Mariam Said. another lost friend. we were play mates back then.. together with Kamaliah and Suraya. would like to meet her again..
so yeah, after 11 years, with His Will, i was in the same room as Yasmin again~ were busy chit-chatting til right before the class started.. aahh.. so much to ask, so much to know ^_^
you know, moments like this, kan, or particular points in life where i found or met someone with whom i've lost contact or not seen for ages, remind me of how long i have lived. it's like, wow.. it's been 11 years.. Allah has let me live to see today, now, this moment. mcm 'benchmark' gitu.. ermm.. not sure how to describe it exactly.. another example is RR. when RR'08 and ramadhan 1429H arrived, i realised.. "Ya Allah.. i'm still alive. You've given me another year (that is, measuring from RR'07).. one long year..*reflective mood*.."
hmmm... recently, on 15 feb, i bumped into kak Hafizah.. kat luar tpt solat perempuan kat mks. terus peluk dia erat2. one of the best feelings ever! alhamdulillah~ alhamdulillah~~~ sayangnya, kita sempat bertanya khabar je, coz she was leaving for a meeting. takpe, takpe. another time. oh, i also saw kak Izzah.. earlier ah.. mase CPR last.. umm.. december?.. meskipun tak rapat/kurang kenal, kite tetap rasa gembira dpt jumpa a senior :) haaa... sekarang ni, tgl kak Raihana je kite belom dipertemukan lagi.. in time, InshaAllah~
.jpg)
here's another picture, taken on the same day as the above pic. back row from left --
1. Syarafina. met her recently mase raihana's nikah ceremony. haiz~ sungguh dah dewasa dia ni! hehe.. seriously ah.. i feel like a child sey next to her. she is currently in KUIS, taking usuluddin klw tak silap. final year.
2. Hafizah Sariupua. dah lama tak jumpa dia. 2 years gitu kot? i think she's working now.
3. Farhana. she is in ma'arif, taking pre-u. (or dah grad?)
4. Sharifah. she's another long lost friend~ her sister, Khadijah, was also in the same class. two of my good friends that time. they left during primary 4 or 5 gitu. after that, terus tak dengar khabar. i really really hope to see them both again..!
5. Shari'ah. aaahh.. i wonder if i can recognise her if we were to pass each other in the streets?
middle row --
6. Khairunnisa Said. adik kepada Huda Said. i wonder how both of them are doing.. and how many kids Huda has now..
7. Mariam Said.
8. Shahriza.
im looking forward to more suprises that Allah has for me. i'm sure, bila Allah temukan kembali diri ni dan seseorang tu, it is at the right time. so, i shall wait =)
sampai ghufran around 7pm gitu.. after solat maghrib then we made our way to the classroom. someone was already there. immediately after i salam-ed her, a sense of familiarity struck me. a name was forming in my head..
"what's your name?"
"sekolah mana..?"
"were you from alsagoff..?"
indeed! she is the Yasmin, my classmate wayyyy back in primary level. Yasmin Hamzah.. she transferred to another madrasah when she was in primary 3 gitu..
masyaAllah...! what a coincidence.. what a coincidence. k, i need not explain further how i felt. im sure you've read my previous posts about meeting people whom i've not seen for a loOng time.
primary 2 or 3 kotfrom the left --
1. Shahriza, is it? i forgot her name.. she also left the school some time during the primary school days.. but i know she has an elder sister who has bulu mata yang lentik and suka cubit hidayah johari.. sebab hidayah johari ade bulu mata lentik jugak. hehe.. i've no idea how to find her.. :(
2. Yasmin! yeah, i remember her as a short, quiet girl.. suara serak2 basah. sekarang.. lebih tinggi dari kite kot.
3. Hafizah Sariupua. alhamdulillah... both of us stayed on til sec 4. altho we didnt graduate the same year. oh yes, she is tallll.. macam syarafina jugak. and sweet, too :)
4. Mariam Said. another lost friend. we were play mates back then.. together with Kamaliah and Suraya. would like to meet her again..
so yeah, after 11 years, with His Will, i was in the same room as Yasmin again~ were busy chit-chatting til right before the class started.. aahh.. so much to ask, so much to know ^_^
you know, moments like this, kan, or particular points in life where i found or met someone with whom i've lost contact or not seen for ages, remind me of how long i have lived. it's like, wow.. it's been 11 years.. Allah has let me live to see today, now, this moment. mcm 'benchmark' gitu.. ermm.. not sure how to describe it exactly.. another example is RR. when RR'08 and ramadhan 1429H arrived, i realised.. "Ya Allah.. i'm still alive. You've given me another year (that is, measuring from RR'07).. one long year..*reflective mood*.."
hmmm... recently, on 15 feb, i bumped into kak Hafizah.. kat luar tpt solat perempuan kat mks. terus peluk dia erat2. one of the best feelings ever! alhamdulillah~ alhamdulillah~~~ sayangnya, kita sempat bertanya khabar je, coz she was leaving for a meeting. takpe, takpe. another time. oh, i also saw kak Izzah.. earlier ah.. mase CPR last.. umm.. december?.. meskipun tak rapat/kurang kenal, kite tetap rasa gembira dpt jumpa a senior :) haaa... sekarang ni, tgl kak Raihana je kite belom dipertemukan lagi.. in time, InshaAllah~
.jpg)
here's another picture, taken on the same day as the above pic. back row from left --
1. Syarafina. met her recently mase raihana's nikah ceremony. haiz~ sungguh dah dewasa dia ni! hehe.. seriously ah.. i feel like a child sey next to her. she is currently in KUIS, taking usuluddin klw tak silap. final year.
2. Hafizah Sariupua. dah lama tak jumpa dia. 2 years gitu kot? i think she's working now.
3. Farhana. she is in ma'arif, taking pre-u. (or dah grad?)
4. Sharifah. she's another long lost friend~ her sister, Khadijah, was also in the same class. two of my good friends that time. they left during primary 4 or 5 gitu. after that, terus tak dengar khabar. i really really hope to see them both again..!
5. Shari'ah. aaahh.. i wonder if i can recognise her if we were to pass each other in the streets?
middle row --
6. Khairunnisa Said. adik kepada Huda Said. i wonder how both of them are doing.. and how many kids Huda has now..
7. Mariam Said.
8. Shahriza.
im looking forward to more suprises that Allah has for me. i'm sure, bila Allah temukan kembali diri ni dan seseorang tu, it is at the right time. so, i shall wait =)
contoh anak mithali
Wasalam!on saturday eh..im really not sure bole tk coz tktau dad keje tak..but i'll try my very best to come n once i get e permission,i msg u ASAP..sori n thank you!
22:56:47
29.12.2008
this message was about the retreat which was going to be held on that weekend.
cuba teka, yang hantar sms ni lelaki ke perempuan?
...
..
.
lelaki? perempuan?
.
.
.
if you guess 'lelaki', yup, you're right! heee... klw perempuan yang hantar message sebegini.. tak lah hairan sgt smpi post kat blog, ye tak? haha..
bila baca kiriman di atas.. dlm hati ni terdetik, "alahai~ sweeetnyer dia" tersenyum sendiri kite dibuatnya. mcm terharu ah lihat anak lelaki *remaja* yang baik (insha Allah!). ingat untuk meminta izin dari mak, ayah. (tapikan, klw umur dah masuk 20-an, masih ade ke yang teruskan amalan ni? atau dah 'upgrade' kepada sekadar beritahu "mak, ali balik lewat malam ni. ada hal dgn kawan"? atau langsung tak beritahu apa2?) ye lah, bukan dia seorang je, bahkan, alhamdulillah.. banin yang lain pon baik-baik belaka :)
22:56:47
29.12.2008
this message was about the retreat which was going to be held on that weekend.
cuba teka, yang hantar sms ni lelaki ke perempuan?
...
..
.
lelaki? perempuan?
.
.
.
if you guess 'lelaki', yup, you're right! heee... klw perempuan yang hantar message sebegini.. tak lah hairan sgt smpi post kat blog, ye tak? haha..
bila baca kiriman di atas.. dlm hati ni terdetik, "alahai~ sweeetnyer dia" tersenyum sendiri kite dibuatnya. mcm terharu ah lihat anak lelaki *remaja* yang baik (insha Allah!). ingat untuk meminta izin dari mak, ayah. (tapikan, klw umur dah masuk 20-an, masih ade ke yang teruskan amalan ni? atau dah 'upgrade' kepada sekadar beritahu "mak, ali balik lewat malam ni. ada hal dgn kawan"? atau langsung tak beritahu apa2?) ye lah, bukan dia seorang je, bahkan, alhamdulillah.. banin yang lain pon baik-baik belaka :)
Ya Allah.. Jadikanlah kami anak-anak yang soleh dan solehah buat ibubapa kami.
Semoga apa yang kami lakukan disenangi dan direstui mereka.
Assalaamua'laikum wr wb
Beloved brothers and sisters,
Would like to say a big syukran jazeelan to one and all for your dedicated resolve and sacrificing spirit today!
May you be duly rewarded indeed. Barakallahu fikum!
As of 2200 hours today, the operation ended with 218 donations all accounted for and safely transferred over to Certis Cisco for processing. Insya Allah we will have full knowledge on the amount of proceeds on Friday.
Meanwhile, the donation drive also saw the activation of 400 activists, youth and volunteers who came from all walks of life to help in this cause, muslim and non-muslim alike.
This is an interesting number, and I think affirms that with a collective effort and driven activists, the road to igniting others into activism and perhaps, just perhaps fabrics or early steps towards social (re)construction is indeed possible.
Also, I sincerely hope that this network of activist will be binded further together thus being able to create bigger change into the society in the future. Doesn't matter what platform(s) we ride on but simply with a common fikrah or ideals and principles hence functioning in a collectivism that manifest into some impact and, yes, change.
Let's be a part of this wave of activism!
Thank you again and Hayakumullah ...
the street donation
alhamdulillah.. alhamdulillah.. alhamdulillah..
im glad i was there, at mjd sultan today.
[oh, before i go further, i just wanna request something: please dont go and cut-n-paste this post or send the link to your friends/organisation(s) with that note - heyy, we got good feedback from a volunteer! *insertsmileyface*. this is for your own read~]
most of the time i just manned the booth. to kill time, i tried to continue reading a book about the life of a neurosurgeon [informative, insightful, and kelakar gak! hee]. or, i would listen to the brothers' chatters. best jugak dgr diorang berbual nih. tanye diorang ttg course yang diorang ambil. tanye pasal army. bla bla bla.. well, kite ni suker tanye. dapat gak ilmu sikit2, info2 baru dari diorang.
dapat berkenalan dgn 2 particular sisters.. kak ida and one more.. uh-oh.. i dont know her name.. from NUS.
bila tgh jaga booth tu, byk kali gak someone just came and inserted $$ into the donation tins. pakcik, makcik, kakak, abang.. foreigners.. non-muslims. masyaAllah.. masyaAllah.. terharu! kita ade letak signage kat 2 of the front gates. they must've seen. yes, cukup gembira bila lihat tangan2 yang menghulur.
before zohor gitu, the crowd outside masjid got bigger. coz there was a function kat audi, so mereka ni nak pulang ah. ape lagi, me and another bro angkut the collection tins and approach them. tahmid.. tahmid.. my spirits lifted. i went around the masjid. eager to approach anyone in my way. just do it!
then, i kinda felt im not doing what im supposed to do. why on earth am i sitting in this chair? i was getting too comfortable and lazy ah.. hmm.. so,
after asar, 5.15pm; ohh.. 45 more minutes to 6pm. supposedly end at 6pm. so me ajak the sisters, "jom! lagi 45 minit je. let's do what we can!"... so me and the NUS kakak walked along sungei road *first time whoaaooo* turn to ophir road, then to bugis village. wah, kat sini baru kite nampak: people's behaviour and their response towards those who are collecting donations. their indifference. wooww [saying this slowly].. and myself, how i had this 'reluctance' to approach people.. kira pilih bulu ah.. you should just go, liyana! go! just do it!
we left bugis village and walked outside BHG, crossed the small field to raffles hospital and made our way back to mjd sultan. along the way, yeah, we held out the donation tins. i realise i like to smile. i mean, i feel happy.. no wait, it's more like, i feel good greeting people with a smile.. even though they may respond by looking away.. looking straight ahead.. yada yada. ntah lah eh.. i say to myself, go liyana.. just go.. show your enthusiasm. your spirits. treat people with courtesy. "thank you very much!" smile "thank you..!" heh, ade some moments gak nak cakap jazaakallahu khair out loud. managed to suppress it though. klw tak, mesti orang tgk kite lain macam.
haha.. i kinda braced myself when approaching a group of mat saleh teenagers.. my gut said they wouldnt donate. but what the heck? just go ah. yeah, and so, they didnt donate. it's okay. at least, i overcame the apprehension feeling, or whatever you call it lah.
i think, basically, what i got from here is.. to just forget about being shy. just do your thing, ya know? smile and ask politely. forget about being hesitant. yeah, i was trying to shed that.
but at the same time, perceptions were forming in my mind.. e.g. who are the ones who show most indifference and/or ignorance.
and it's touching to see people putting $$, especially notes.. some big notes too, into the donation tin.. especially, non-muslims.. Ya Allah, mudahkanlah urusan mereka.. Ya Allah, kurniakanlah HidayahMu pada mereka..
felt the warmth of joy when listening to sisters sharing their stories, some are cute, some are funny, some are 'grrrrr', some are 'awwwww'.. all in all, i enjoyed myself. since most of the time, i was glued to the booth.
it's humbling. knowing that He puts me in this, to learn, to experience. tahmid.. tahmid..
adding to that, i became more informed about 2 particular initiatives by our muslim youths: IM4U and MGN. im thankful for the conversations i had with bro ashraf and kak nadiah. it's humbling. knowing that there are fellow malay muslim youths, students, whom despite their school workload, have this passion. to islah. to improve. to change. now that, is inspiring!
[start lament]
hmmm... should've done more. should've taken one tin and gone all the way to cityhall or esplanade. raffles would be nice too. i admit, i sat more than i walked. guilty. somehow, i didnt go all out like i thought i would.
[/end lament]
btw kan, klw kita tgk, aktiviti ni macam biasa je. tak gah pon mcm RR. tapi, pengajarannya.. hmmm.. packaged in subtle ways. *breaksintoasmile*
alhamdulillah.. alhamdulillah..
when you read this post again, remember that you were thankful for today, liyana..
and then, i thought to myself.. about where i wanna go after this. should i stay, and contribute through these initatives and/or organisations.. or should i venture out, taking what i've learnt and sharing 'em with those out there.. and get a better worldview. coz i know i will learn something from new people, new places, new situations.
go out, and be the strength that people need.
be the strength.
be. the strength.
-inhale deeply and let go-
should i really go out?
there are already many people working towards the betterment of the community here. im glad for that. a lot of initiatives, movements, groups, programmes..
but what about outside singapore? do they have as much effort done there as here? how are the muslim youths there creating change to their muslim communities? how? who? how much? can i play a part too?
i gain strength from the wonderful people, brothers and sisters, i've crossed paths with, and from the experiences that Allah has allowed me to keep, remember, reflect upon and share. i know very well that it's not enough. maybe not yet enough for me to step foot on a new, foreign ground and start giving.
but the people here need your strength too. need not go far. look around and you'll see there's a lot of work to be done.
Ya Allah... help me..
[about 2 more weeks til NUS/NTU admission exercises end]
i shall end this post with a sort of conclusion, or rather motivational reminder, that could sum up today's lesson:
Are You pleased with what we have done today, Ya Allah..?
*head bows down*
im glad i was there, at mjd sultan today.
[oh, before i go further, i just wanna request something: please dont go and cut-n-paste this post or send the link to your friends/organisation(s) with that note - heyy, we got good feedback from a volunteer! *insertsmileyface*. this is for your own read~]
most of the time i just manned the booth. to kill time, i tried to continue reading a book about the life of a neurosurgeon [informative, insightful, and kelakar gak! hee]. or, i would listen to the brothers' chatters. best jugak dgr diorang berbual nih. tanye diorang ttg course yang diorang ambil. tanye pasal army. bla bla bla.. well, kite ni suker tanye. dapat gak ilmu sikit2, info2 baru dari diorang.
dapat berkenalan dgn 2 particular sisters.. kak ida and one more.. uh-oh.. i dont know her name.. from NUS.
bila tgh jaga booth tu, byk kali gak someone just came and inserted $$ into the donation tins. pakcik, makcik, kakak, abang.. foreigners.. non-muslims. masyaAllah.. masyaAllah.. terharu! kita ade letak signage kat 2 of the front gates. they must've seen. yes, cukup gembira bila lihat tangan2 yang menghulur.
before zohor gitu, the crowd outside masjid got bigger. coz there was a function kat audi, so mereka ni nak pulang ah. ape lagi, me and another bro angkut the collection tins and approach them. tahmid.. tahmid.. my spirits lifted. i went around the masjid. eager to approach anyone in my way. just do it!
then, i kinda felt im not doing what im supposed to do. why on earth am i sitting in this chair? i was getting too comfortable and lazy ah.. hmm.. so,
after asar, 5.15pm; ohh.. 45 more minutes to 6pm. supposedly end at 6pm. so me ajak the sisters, "jom! lagi 45 minit je. let's do what we can!"... so me and the NUS kakak walked along sungei road *first time whoaaooo* turn to ophir road, then to bugis village. wah, kat sini baru kite nampak: people's behaviour and their response towards those who are collecting donations. their indifference. wooww [saying this slowly].. and myself, how i had this 'reluctance' to approach people.. kira pilih bulu ah.. you should just go, liyana! go! just do it!
we left bugis village and walked outside BHG, crossed the small field to raffles hospital and made our way back to mjd sultan. along the way, yeah, we held out the donation tins. i realise i like to smile. i mean, i feel happy.. no wait, it's more like, i feel good greeting people with a smile.. even though they may respond by looking away.. looking straight ahead.. yada yada. ntah lah eh.. i say to myself, go liyana.. just go.. show your enthusiasm. your spirits. treat people with courtesy. "thank you very much!" smile "thank you..!" heh, ade some moments gak nak cakap jazaakallahu khair out loud. managed to suppress it though. klw tak, mesti orang tgk kite lain macam.
haha.. i kinda braced myself when approaching a group of mat saleh teenagers.. my gut said they wouldnt donate. but what the heck? just go ah. yeah, and so, they didnt donate. it's okay. at least, i overcame the apprehension feeling, or whatever you call it lah.
i think, basically, what i got from here is.. to just forget about being shy. just do your thing, ya know? smile and ask politely. forget about being hesitant. yeah, i was trying to shed that.
but at the same time, perceptions were forming in my mind.. e.g. who are the ones who show most indifference and/or ignorance.
and it's touching to see people putting $$, especially notes.. some big notes too, into the donation tin.. especially, non-muslims.. Ya Allah, mudahkanlah urusan mereka.. Ya Allah, kurniakanlah HidayahMu pada mereka..
felt the warmth of joy when listening to sisters sharing their stories, some are cute, some are funny, some are 'grrrrr', some are 'awwwww'.. all in all, i enjoyed myself. since most of the time, i was glued to the booth.
it's humbling. knowing that He puts me in this, to learn, to experience. tahmid.. tahmid..
adding to that, i became more informed about 2 particular initiatives by our muslim youths: IM4U and MGN. im thankful for the conversations i had with bro ashraf and kak nadiah. it's humbling. knowing that there are fellow malay muslim youths, students, whom despite their school workload, have this passion. to islah. to improve. to change. now that, is inspiring!
[start lament]
hmmm... should've done more. should've taken one tin and gone all the way to cityhall or esplanade. raffles would be nice too. i admit, i sat more than i walked. guilty. somehow, i didnt go all out like i thought i would.
[/end lament]
btw kan, klw kita tgk, aktiviti ni macam biasa je. tak gah pon mcm RR. tapi, pengajarannya.. hmmm.. packaged in subtle ways. *breaksintoasmile*
alhamdulillah.. alhamdulillah..
when you read this post again, remember that you were thankful for today, liyana..
and then, i thought to myself.. about where i wanna go after this. should i stay, and contribute through these initatives and/or organisations.. or should i venture out, taking what i've learnt and sharing 'em with those out there.. and get a better worldview. coz i know i will learn something from new people, new places, new situations.
go out, and be the strength that people need.
be the strength.
be. the strength.
-inhale deeply and let go-
should i really go out?
there are already many people working towards the betterment of the community here. im glad for that. a lot of initiatives, movements, groups, programmes..
but what about outside singapore? do they have as much effort done there as here? how are the muslim youths there creating change to their muslim communities? how? who? how much? can i play a part too?
i gain strength from the wonderful people, brothers and sisters, i've crossed paths with, and from the experiences that Allah has allowed me to keep, remember, reflect upon and share. i know very well that it's not enough. maybe not yet enough for me to step foot on a new, foreign ground and start giving.
but the people here need your strength too. need not go far. look around and you'll see there's a lot of work to be done.
Ya Allah... help me..
[about 2 more weeks til NUS/NTU admission exercises end]
i shall end this post with a sort of conclusion, or rather motivational reminder, that could sum up today's lesson:
Give all that you've got.
But if you can't -
More importantly,
Never stop giving.. never.
*head bows down*
on a lighter note.........
Alf Mubarak to Kak Hidayati and Bro Rizal...!
^_^
'Umar 'Abdillah.. sedap nama tu. moga dia menjadi seperti kedua2 'Umar - berwibawa, telus, berani, berhikmah... humble and just ;)
i've been thinking about the name 'Umar for quite some time too. korang cube sebut. 'U-mar. *sighs and looks dreamily at nowhere* 'Umar al-Khattab. 'Umar 'Abdul 'Aziz. really ah.. bila teringatkan kisah mereka - perwatakan dan perbuatan, the characters of these two persons are strongly reflected in that one word: 'Umar.
'Umar + Mujahid = 'Umar Mujahid hehe.. *melts*
k k.. i know, kat Tautan Hati dah ade nama tu..
Alf Mubarak to Kak Hidayati and Bro Rizal...!
^_^
'Umar 'Abdillah.. sedap nama tu. moga dia menjadi seperti kedua2 'Umar - berwibawa, telus, berani, berhikmah... humble and just ;)
i've been thinking about the name 'Umar for quite some time too. korang cube sebut. 'U-mar. *sighs and looks dreamily at nowhere* 'Umar al-Khattab. 'Umar 'Abdul 'Aziz. really ah.. bila teringatkan kisah mereka - perwatakan dan perbuatan, the characters of these two persons are strongly reflected in that one word: 'Umar.
'Umar + Mujahid = 'Umar Mujahid hehe.. *melts*
k k.. i know, kat Tautan Hati dah ade nama tu..
im at the 'asthma' stage now.
it's been quite some time since i last caught the common cold+flu.
so, it started last saturday. with coughs. as i was unstoppably (is there such a word?) reading Twilight til the wee hours of sunday.
on sunday, the cough continued and then my throat became 'uncomfortable'. hmm.. i dunno how to describe it. y'all should know, right? and i slept with my TP windbreaker on.
monday morning, still the same. but i suspected that the worse had yet to come. so i took a Panadol tablet in the morning. must have fallen asleep in the bus. i felt better in the afternoon. continued to read Twilight. then, it was time for me to get another pill, but i didnt have any. hmmm... on the way to muhajirin, felt like the fever and headache might be coming soon. I NEED MY PANADOL. on the way home - that was it. i was officially sick with fever. bought a box of Panadol Cold Relief at 7-Eleven. popped one into my mouth. did my prayers.
i was a zombie. slouched on the sofa, trying to watch the tv. uh-oh. there were 2 quizzes the next day. noOoOOoo.. i couldn't study. i didn't want to study. could i be absent? i would just get the MC from the polyclinic. fell asleep there. mum brought out the pillows and blanket. aaahh.. heaven. didnt sleep well though. cold? took another dose of Panadol on midnite. zZzZzz..
tuesday - oh! i felt much better, alhamdulillah~~ but but! i still hadnt touched any of my notes. what should i do? still go to the doctor and feign fever? i cant do that! mmmmmmmm.... last minute revision; not quite, more like first-time learning, coz the notes were fresh from the printer (on monday). read thru.. tawakkal.. selawat.. tawakkal.. thought and searched harder.. tried to remember bits and pieces.. please.. selawat.. tawakkal.. thank you Allah, for letting me see.. it couldve been much much worse.
anyway, my condition had moved on to runny nose and more sneezing. great! -.-" reached home, fell asleep on the bare floor of my bedroom, with my backpack as the pillow. woke up half past six. took a nice cold shower. felt better even though the mucous was still flowing occasionally.
and today, runny nose/sneezing subsided. but guess what? by now, im sure that the virus are dead. which means they are accumulated in the phlegm (and thick mucous) to be 'sent out' of the respiratory system. hell yeah, i can feel my airways are filled with 'em. hard stuff, ey? so.. am having difficulty breathing; since morning. used my inhaler to open up the bronchi and bronchioles every now and then. took a spoonful of dad's diphenhydramine, the last one, in the morning. only 40 minutes ago i consumed my second cough syrup of the day. errmmm.. no wonder my phlegm is still stuck in my trachea and air tubes. so, the whole day i coughed, and coughed (not too frequent though; it's irritating and can worry the people around you; and can be dangerous for your muscles and nerves).. you know, sometimes you feel that the phlegm is just right there, loosening, and you just have to cough a bit more to get that stubborn lump out? yeah.. it's hardwork.
plus, inhaling deeply, trying to get enough air, is tiring. more precisely: exhausting. your lung muscles work harder. you're desperate for air. your airways are constricting.. oh, you wish someone can give you a nebulizer straightaway! and, and, when you exhale, you wheeze.. so the person next to you may just hear how terrible your condition is.
just so you know, having asthma is not cool. if you have an asthma attack, it would be like having first-hand experience of how 'suffocating to death' may be.
i feel that im straining my lungs. chest feels kinda heavy :/
it's been quite some time since i last caught the common cold+flu.
so, it started last saturday. with coughs. as i was unstoppably (is there such a word?) reading Twilight til the wee hours of sunday.
on sunday, the cough continued and then my throat became 'uncomfortable'. hmm.. i dunno how to describe it. y'all should know, right? and i slept with my TP windbreaker on.
monday morning, still the same. but i suspected that the worse had yet to come. so i took a Panadol tablet in the morning. must have fallen asleep in the bus. i felt better in the afternoon. continued to read Twilight. then, it was time for me to get another pill, but i didnt have any. hmmm... on the way to muhajirin, felt like the fever and headache might be coming soon. I NEED MY PANADOL. on the way home - that was it. i was officially sick with fever. bought a box of Panadol Cold Relief at 7-Eleven. popped one into my mouth. did my prayers.
i was a zombie. slouched on the sofa, trying to watch the tv. uh-oh. there were 2 quizzes the next day. noOoOOoo.. i couldn't study. i didn't want to study. could i be absent? i would just get the MC from the polyclinic. fell asleep there. mum brought out the pillows and blanket. aaahh.. heaven. didnt sleep well though. cold? took another dose of Panadol on midnite. zZzZzz..
tuesday - oh! i felt much better, alhamdulillah~~ but but! i still hadnt touched any of my notes. what should i do? still go to the doctor and feign fever? i cant do that! mmmmmmmm.... last minute revision; not quite, more like first-time learning, coz the notes were fresh from the printer (on monday). read thru.. tawakkal.. selawat.. tawakkal.. thought and searched harder.. tried to remember bits and pieces.. please.. selawat.. tawakkal.. thank you Allah, for letting me see.. it couldve been much much worse.
anyway, my condition had moved on to runny nose and more sneezing. great! -.-" reached home, fell asleep on the bare floor of my bedroom, with my backpack as the pillow. woke up half past six. took a nice cold shower. felt better even though the mucous was still flowing occasionally.
and today, runny nose/sneezing subsided. but guess what? by now, im sure that the virus are dead. which means they are accumulated in the phlegm (and thick mucous) to be 'sent out' of the respiratory system. hell yeah, i can feel my airways are filled with 'em. hard stuff, ey? so.. am having difficulty breathing; since morning. used my inhaler to open up the bronchi and bronchioles every now and then. took a spoonful of dad's diphenhydramine, the last one, in the morning. only 40 minutes ago i consumed my second cough syrup of the day. errmmm.. no wonder my phlegm is still stuck in my trachea and air tubes. so, the whole day i coughed, and coughed (not too frequent though; it's irritating and can worry the people around you; and can be dangerous for your muscles and nerves).. you know, sometimes you feel that the phlegm is just right there, loosening, and you just have to cough a bit more to get that stubborn lump out? yeah.. it's hardwork.
plus, inhaling deeply, trying to get enough air, is tiring. more precisely: exhausting. your lung muscles work harder. you're desperate for air. your airways are constricting.. oh, you wish someone can give you a nebulizer straightaway! and, and, when you exhale, you wheeze.. so the person next to you may just hear how terrible your condition is.
just so you know, having asthma is not cool. if you have an asthma attack, it would be like having first-hand experience of how 'suffocating to death' may be.
i feel that im straining my lungs. chest feels kinda heavy :/
Kali ke-dua ke sini.
cukup tepat.
"Tulisan ini merupakan satu wadah untuk aku sentiasa mengingati diri ini yang dhaif untuk terus mengkaji dan mengkaji. Bukan sekadar mengambil bulat-bulat apa yang didengar khususnya perkara berkaitan aqidah kerana aqidah yang diterima oleh Allah adalah aqidah yang benar mengikuti fahaman salafus-salih berdasarkan dalil-dalil yang sabit daripada Kitabullah dan Sunnah Rasulihi."
diambil dari penulisan bertajuk Di Mana? [bertarikh 1 December 2008]
cukup tepat.
A weekend of...
.. Fort Canning Park with Sis (saturday, 20 dec '08, 2.30pm)
it was actually a recce, for NI retreat. invited a few sisters (too few, actually).. none of 'em could make it. then, i thought of postponing to one of the coming weekdays. but nah~ i needed to get fresh air anyway. so, i brought my sister along :)
we alighted at City Hall mrt station. sebab dah lama tak jejak kaki kat situ, i was feeling extra happy, and perhaps, jakOn, to see many people, from different walks of life, going this way and that way.
and for the first time of my life (im sure of it!), i stepped into Raffles City Shopping Centre. uWoW~ looking at the boutiques and window displays.. teringat Suntec City Shopping Mall. mewah betOl~ jalan2 kat tingkat satu je, then made our way to fort canning park based on the sole memory of NI Election back in 2006.
looks like a large area, ey? it is lah.. from the starting point ("you are here" sign) we covered one big round. yupz! oh, i should've brought insect repellent, though. or maybe, coz of the heat of the day, so we got sweaty and itchy.
scenic! scenic! right in front of this fountain are the steps down to the main entrance of the park. behind, is the Raffles Terrace. unfortunately, it's small. had the chance to read a plaque at the side of the so-called house; could be that the original house had been shrunk to the mere hall that we can see today, or it could've been situated somewhere else and this hall is just a 'symbol', memorial, or whatever you wanna call it.
The surrounding area is.. cantik! green, clean grass.. the trees are not so tall. or wide. which means, it's exposed to sunlight. so too bad, we cant have the retreat there.
from top left:
the sheltered area where we had our NI Election 2006. i was really new sey. tau2 je, was invited to go. and i remember the colour code: kuning! feeling2 royal ah.. coz this hill was where the sultan's palace once stood.
the Raffles Terrace. right in front, in the middle, is a flagstaff. tak ingat what's the significance.
a bench facing a lampost. i was amused; why on earth is the bench is there? a person sits there and he can only watch the fence, the lampost and the few trees. agak terperuk pon ade. haha. mcm tak strategic dan tak scenic. O.o
that's my sister, konon tgh tgk ape2 ntah.. klw takde the marquee, i think the shot would be a bit nicer. this is the open space in front ofThe Legends aka Fort Canning Centre, called Fort Canning Green. i am sure this is where arts events and concerts are usually held. mesti mahal, kan, sewanya? when we got to The Legends, rupe2nya ade orang kahwin. saw the bride and groom, tgh nak pose for wedding shoot. oh, we saw another couple earlier dekat2 Raffles Terrace. memang elok ah klw nak ambil gambar kat fort canning park.. as well as the many gardens kat Singapore ni.. cuma get ready with small towel ke.. sebab klw cuaca panas, alahai~ heh. good thing now ade 'sweat-proof' make-up. haha
this tree kinda fascinated me. dahannya panjang menjalar. you can see in the picture two of 'em are supported by poles. the red-orange flowers add beauty to this tree. it must be old, like many other trees that we saw. tapi kan, dekat2 roots of the tree, byk kerangga, those big fire red ants.
from top left:
kat tingkat paling bawah ofThe Legends Fort Canning Centre rupe2nya ade sekolah memasak. At-Sunrise GlobalChef Academy. must be a highly reputable school. sempat jugak me and aqila jenguk2 what's behind the glass-paned doors. anyway, there's this water feature (i dunno the correct vocab for this) beside the main entrance door. suker!
sitting on the steps leading right intoThe LegendsFort Canning Centre. actually nak ambil gambar berdua on the steps, tapi couldnt get the camera position right. padahal ade orang2 kat situ to help ambilkan, eh? heheh.. ape2 je karenah kita kat situ. oh, the 'orang2' there were actually para jemputan yang gi majlis kahwin tu. haha
that's me leaning on a coconut tree. it's actually on a small slope, so that tree kinda bends outwards.. hmm.. if you know what i mean.
trees and clouds. blend in beautifully.
Subhanallah!
memorial plaques, lined on the two walls outsideThe LegendsFort Canning Centre. A lof of the inscriptions begin with SACRED. Angelina was 3 years old. Charles Henry was 21, a most dutiful and affectionate son and brother. Hier Ruhet means here rests in German - Carl Wilhelm Andreas Albert (i think it's one person's name, not two) who was born 135 years before i was. These plaques, they are actually tombstones. the Fort Canning Green was once a christian cemetery. wooOooOOOoo..~
The Battle Box! i saw the door to the underground far east command centre first. apparently we had missed the 5pm, the last, visiting slot. i dunno if this building is part of the Battle Box, but the ticket counter's there.
at The Spice Garden. didnt pay much attention to the plants. instead, we took multiple shots sitting on this bench. i think it was past 5pm. legs were getting to get tired. but we made our way to the archeological excavation site and Keramat Iskandar Shah. i think the former is creepier. especially if you're by yourself walking inside the not-that-long gallery to see the pieces of ceramics, jewelleries and whatnots.
as aqila was signing the guestbook at the archeological site, i took these pictures.
Prehistoric Singapore - Although no evidence of prehistoric man has yet been discovered on Singapore, sites with stone tools have been found on Pulau Tekong and on the south shore of Johor. Probably prehistoric people occasionally occupied Singapore, and gathered food here.
The Founding of Temasik - By the early 14th century, Singapore had its own government: the kingdom of Temasik. Chinese traders had already come to settle here by 1330. The palace was built on Fort Canning Hill.
peering thru the window.. nothing inside actually. just a white-walled room. as the sign said, "White Studio".
after ~3 hours of sight-seeing, we returned to our starting point. we didnt descend there, tho. we walked towards the Raffles Terrace fountain and exited via the Hill Street Entrance. we strolled along the Parliament House (fuyo~ first time jejak sana!) and reached the bridge. i dunno its name, but it was surely my first time crossing it on foot. then, we passed all the restaurants and pubs, towards OUB Plaza. again, it was my first. my sis' too. dapat tgk crabs lobsters and whatnots.. the different on-the-table arrangements, deco.. nampak sah kita dua macam tourist kat situ. local. tourist.
bila tgh jalan2.. i was taking it all in. the sights. cantiknya~ it's the river lah.. makes the difference. Rabbij'al hadza baladan aaminaa.. Ya Tuhanku, jadikanlah negeri ini negeri yang aman..
we didnt end there. after taking rest on one of the many seats overlooking Empress' Place, we took a walk in the middle of the CBD.. tak tahu ape nama area tu. it's where people mostly exit from the mrt station below. time ni, dah masuk maghrib. we took train to Bugis. coz i felt like going to the National Library pulak. and Chewy Junior. :p at last, tak gi library. went to Banquet at Raffles Hospital. ate fruit salad while waiting for abang to pick us up.
that's how our day went. i felt happy the whole time. alhamdulillah..!
.. Changi Village and East Coast Park with Family (Sunday, 21 dec '08, 10am)
had our nasi lemak breakfast at Changi Village. no, no, bukan dari kedai yang asyik long queue tu. but from another stall that my bro recommended. after that, pikir nak picnic kat Changi Beach je. tapi, sebab nak main basikal, we made our way to East Coast Park.
guess who's the one who doesnt know how to ride a bicycle?? XD
and since abang got his rollerblades inside the bonnet, i took them out to give rollerblading a try. another first time. oh God! forget about being shy or embarrassed - i fell down, stood in funny positions.. enjoyed myself alright! had abang and mak or aqila to hold my arm. yupz, susah nak balance. lagipon, the rollerblades' size is big. i look forward to try it again!
the sea is blue! i just noticed it. selama ni i have a bad impression of ECP ah. the water is brownish.. coz lots of sand, dirt or what lah.. i would prefer the two ends, especially the stretch leading to the airport. tapi, when i was on the jetty, Subhanallah! a beautiful sight every singaporean can be proud of. indah belaka :)
it was also a rare opportunity for me to dip my feet in the water. you see, ayah tak izinkan berenam/mandi kat laut. so, whenever im at a beach with my friends, kite rase bersalah nak jejakkan kaki sikit pon kat air. nak kata jealous kat kawan2, tak jugak. tapi, bila dapat chance ni, ayah pon bagi green light, waahh.. it felt really good. i guess, the restriction made me more grateful of this moment. simple and normal as it seems, it's wonderful for me~
the three of us on the signature jetty. it was hOt, mind you. i tried bro's shades. oh tidak, sungguh tak kena dgn mukaku. hehe.. eh, do you notice, that we wore the same colour? dark blue.
we left the beach at 2pm. next destination was rumah nenek kat Ang Mo Kio. wah~ lepak habis kat situ. after asar, kita bertolak. the rest of the family went home, tapi kite plak ke .....
.. Marina Barrage (Sunday, 21 dec'08, 6pm)
reached Marina Bay mrt stn aroud 6pm. waited for the other sisters. i was dismayed when i got to know that 2 brothers were joining us. tapi kite tak cakap ape2 ah. yang bagusnya, diorang lambat. so, me, kak fiza and kak ruqayyah took the shuttle bus. sampai, keluar dari bus, walked towards the entrance.. and we were greeted by a... oohhhh! what a sight! woww.. wowww.. waaahh.. ooohh.. serene. spacious. the sea. the sky. subhanallah, subhanallah..
as we made our way inside the complex, we couldnt stop ooh- and ahh-ing. yeah, it was awesome! below are some of the pictures taken:
me and kak ruqayyah main air jugak. wheee~~ couldnt get enough of it! best sangat2! you know, i think i found another side of kak ruqayyah. gila-gila jugak mcm yours truly nih. hahaha.. we talked crap and had quite a big share of smiles and laughter.
aroung maghrib gitu, kak fadz, kak saqinah and kak sarah with another sister (siapa namanya eh?) sampai. the two brothers too. i just acted as though they were not there. i didnt mean to be cold or anything, i simply dont have anything to say to them. them aside, i really enjoyed the company of my gal seniors!
we had a little picnic at the top floor of the complex. open-air. sejuk je rase.. boleh tertidur kat seats, floor or even the grass. this actually reminded me of Marina South Pier. bro brought aqila and me there one night, many many months back. peaceful. far from the sounds and lights from the towns. angin sepoi2 bahasa. mmmmmmm~~~
sempat jugak me and kak ruqayyah baring kat one of the cemented seats. staring into the dark sky. blissful, indeed!
the last shuttle bus was supposed to leave at 8pm. mase tu, kita semua belom puas dgn Marina Barrage, so we decided to give it a miss and suffer the long walk to the mrt stn later. we didnt even remember the exact route out. but i guess we couldnt care less at that time.
we left the place shortly before 9pm. and suprise suprise! there was a shuttle bus. if i remember correctly, the sign on the bus said "LAST BUS". *huge relief* and so, me, kak fiza, kak ruqayyah and kak saqinah took bus, while kak fadz and the bros with their motorbikes.
thank you for inviting me, kak fiza :) im glad i came.
on the whole.. i feel that this is the best weekend i've ever had. i cant remember the last time i felt happy, care-free. i think it's coz of the mixture of experience.. one with my sister, i took this as a time to be with myself and get away from everything. another with family (we seldom go out like this together, so i cherish 'em) and the weekend ended with a bunch of great sisters.
thank You.. thank You.
it was actually a recce, for NI retreat. invited a few sisters (too few, actually).. none of 'em could make it. then, i thought of postponing to one of the coming weekdays. but nah~ i needed to get fresh air anyway. so, i brought my sister along :)
we alighted at City Hall mrt station. sebab dah lama tak jejak kaki kat situ, i was feeling extra happy, and perhaps, jakOn, to see many people, from different walks of life, going this way and that way.
and for the first time of my life (im sure of it!), i stepped into Raffles City Shopping Centre. uWoW~ looking at the boutiques and window displays.. teringat Suntec City Shopping Mall. mewah betOl~ jalan2 kat tingkat satu je, then made our way to fort canning park based on the sole memory of NI Election back in 2006.
looks like a large area, ey? it is lah.. from the starting point ("you are here" sign) we covered one big round. yupz! oh, i should've brought insect repellent, though. or maybe, coz of the heat of the day, so we got sweaty and itchy.
scenic! scenic! right in front of this fountain are the steps down to the main entrance of the park. behind, is the Raffles Terrace. unfortunately, it's small. had the chance to read a plaque at the side of the so-called house; could be that the original house had been shrunk to the mere hall that we can see today, or it could've been situated somewhere else and this hall is just a 'symbol', memorial, or whatever you wanna call it.
The surrounding area is.. cantik! green, clean grass.. the trees are not so tall. or wide. which means, it's exposed to sunlight. so too bad, we cant have the retreat there.
from top left:
the sheltered area where we had our NI Election 2006. i was really new sey. tau2 je, was invited to go. and i remember the colour code: kuning! feeling2 royal ah.. coz this hill was where the sultan's palace once stood.
the Raffles Terrace. right in front, in the middle, is a flagstaff. tak ingat what's the significance.
a bench facing a lampost. i was amused; why on earth is the bench is there? a person sits there and he can only watch the fence, the lampost and the few trees. agak terperuk pon ade. haha. mcm tak strategic dan tak scenic. O.o
that's my sister, konon tgh tgk ape2 ntah.. klw takde the marquee, i think the shot would be a bit nicer. this is the open space in front of
this tree kinda fascinated me. dahannya panjang menjalar. you can see in the picture two of 'em are supported by poles. the red-orange flowers add beauty to this tree. it must be old, like many other trees that we saw. tapi kan, dekat2 roots of the tree, byk kerangga, those big fire red ants.
from top left:
kat tingkat paling bawah of
sitting on the steps leading right into
that's me leaning on a coconut tree. it's actually on a small slope, so that tree kinda bends outwards.. hmm.. if you know what i mean.
trees and clouds. blend in beautifully.
Subhanallah!
memorial plaques, lined on the two walls outside
The Battle Box! i saw the door to the underground far east command centre first. apparently we had missed the 5pm, the last, visiting slot. i dunno if this building is part of the Battle Box, but the ticket counter's there.
at The Spice Garden. didnt pay much attention to the plants. instead, we took multiple shots sitting on this bench. i think it was past 5pm. legs were getting to get tired. but we made our way to the archeological excavation site and Keramat Iskandar Shah. i think the former is creepier. especially if you're by yourself walking inside the not-that-long gallery to see the pieces of ceramics, jewelleries and whatnots.
as aqila was signing the guestbook at the archeological site, i took these pictures.
Prehistoric Singapore - Although no evidence of prehistoric man has yet been discovered on Singapore, sites with stone tools have been found on Pulau Tekong and on the south shore of Johor. Probably prehistoric people occasionally occupied Singapore, and gathered food here.
The Founding of Temasik - By the early 14th century, Singapore had its own government: the kingdom of Temasik. Chinese traders had already come to settle here by 1330. The palace was built on Fort Canning Hill.
peering thru the window.. nothing inside actually. just a white-walled room. as the sign said, "White Studio".
after ~3 hours of sight-seeing, we returned to our starting point. we didnt descend there, tho. we walked towards the Raffles Terrace fountain and exited via the Hill Street Entrance. we strolled along the Parliament House (fuyo~ first time jejak sana!) and reached the bridge. i dunno its name, but it was surely my first time crossing it on foot. then, we passed all the restaurants and pubs, towards OUB Plaza. again, it was my first. my sis' too. dapat tgk crabs lobsters and whatnots.. the different on-the-table arrangements, deco.. nampak sah kita dua macam tourist kat situ. local. tourist.
bila tgh jalan2.. i was taking it all in. the sights. cantiknya~ it's the river lah.. makes the difference. Rabbij'al hadza baladan aaminaa.. Ya Tuhanku, jadikanlah negeri ini negeri yang aman..
we didnt end there. after taking rest on one of the many seats overlooking Empress' Place, we took a walk in the middle of the CBD.. tak tahu ape nama area tu. it's where people mostly exit from the mrt station below. time ni, dah masuk maghrib. we took train to Bugis. coz i felt like going to the National Library pulak. and Chewy Junior. :p at last, tak gi library. went to Banquet at Raffles Hospital. ate fruit salad while waiting for abang to pick us up.
that's how our day went. i felt happy the whole time. alhamdulillah..!
.. Changi Village and East Coast Park with Family (Sunday, 21 dec '08, 10am)
had our nasi lemak breakfast at Changi Village. no, no, bukan dari kedai yang asyik long queue tu. but from another stall that my bro recommended. after that, pikir nak picnic kat Changi Beach je. tapi, sebab nak main basikal, we made our way to East Coast Park.
guess who's the one who doesnt know how to ride a bicycle?? XD
and since abang got his rollerblades inside the bonnet, i took them out to give rollerblading a try. another first time. oh God! forget about being shy or embarrassed - i fell down, stood in funny positions.. enjoyed myself alright! had abang and mak or aqila to hold my arm. yupz, susah nak balance. lagipon, the rollerblades' size is big. i look forward to try it again!
the sea is blue! i just noticed it. selama ni i have a bad impression of ECP ah. the water is brownish.. coz lots of sand, dirt or what lah.. i would prefer the two ends, especially the stretch leading to the airport. tapi, when i was on the jetty, Subhanallah! a beautiful sight every singaporean can be proud of. indah belaka :)
it was also a rare opportunity for me to dip my feet in the water. you see, ayah tak izinkan berenam/mandi kat laut. so, whenever im at a beach with my friends, kite rase bersalah nak jejakkan kaki sikit pon kat air. nak kata jealous kat kawan2, tak jugak. tapi, bila dapat chance ni, ayah pon bagi green light, waahh.. it felt really good. i guess, the restriction made me more grateful of this moment. simple and normal as it seems, it's wonderful for me~
the three of us on the signature jetty. it was hOt, mind you. i tried bro's shades. oh tidak, sungguh tak kena dgn mukaku. hehe.. eh, do you notice, that we wore the same colour? dark blue.
we left the beach at 2pm. next destination was rumah nenek kat Ang Mo Kio. wah~ lepak habis kat situ. after asar, kita bertolak. the rest of the family went home, tapi kite plak ke .....
.. Marina Barrage (Sunday, 21 dec'08, 6pm)
reached Marina Bay mrt stn aroud 6pm. waited for the other sisters. i was dismayed when i got to know that 2 brothers were joining us. tapi kite tak cakap ape2 ah. yang bagusnya, diorang lambat. so, me, kak fiza and kak ruqayyah took the shuttle bus. sampai, keluar dari bus, walked towards the entrance.. and we were greeted by a... oohhhh! what a sight! woww.. wowww.. waaahh.. ooohh.. serene. spacious. the sea. the sky. subhanallah, subhanallah..
as we made our way inside the complex, we couldnt stop ooh- and ahh-ing. yeah, it was awesome! below are some of the pictures taken:
me and kak ruqayyah main air jugak. wheee~~ couldnt get enough of it! best sangat2! you know, i think i found another side of kak ruqayyah. gila-gila jugak mcm yours truly nih. hahaha.. we talked crap and had quite a big share of smiles and laughter.
aroung maghrib gitu, kak fadz, kak saqinah and kak sarah with another sister (siapa namanya eh?) sampai. the two brothers too. i just acted as though they were not there. i didnt mean to be cold or anything, i simply dont have anything to say to them. them aside, i really enjoyed the company of my gal seniors!
we had a little picnic at the top floor of the complex. open-air. sejuk je rase.. boleh tertidur kat seats, floor or even the grass. this actually reminded me of Marina South Pier. bro brought aqila and me there one night, many many months back. peaceful. far from the sounds and lights from the towns. angin sepoi2 bahasa. mmmmmmm~~~
sempat jugak me and kak ruqayyah baring kat one of the cemented seats. staring into the dark sky. blissful, indeed!
the last shuttle bus was supposed to leave at 8pm. mase tu, kita semua belom puas dgn Marina Barrage, so we decided to give it a miss and suffer the long walk to the mrt stn later. we didnt even remember the exact route out. but i guess we couldnt care less at that time.
we left the place shortly before 9pm. and suprise suprise! there was a shuttle bus. if i remember correctly, the sign on the bus said "LAST BUS". *huge relief* and so, me, kak fiza, kak ruqayyah and kak saqinah took bus, while kak fadz and the bros with their motorbikes.
on the whole.. i feel that this is the best weekend i've ever had. i cant remember the last time i felt happy, care-free. i think it's coz of the mixture of experience.. one with my sister, i took this as a time to be with myself and get away from everything. another with family (we seldom go out like this together, so i cherish 'em) and the weekend ended with a bunch of great sisters.
thank You.. thank You.
i've so much to say, so much to say, so much to say.
but i dont want to write. i want to talk. say it out loud --
i am distracted again. i hate it when it happens. my focus slips.
it causes me to stop writing. coz i feel that i am writing for someone else.
thus i want to see someone. i want to see them.
to tell them, to tell them, to tell them
these feelings of mine
the happiness that's seeping through
the joy
the worry that's gripping me
the sadness
the anxiety that's paralysing
the fear
the excitement that's making me dizzy with ecstacy
ohh.. all these feelings - and more!
they are just, extraordinary;
make me human.
i want to see you. i want to see all of you.
---
i am afraid of the moments when i get distracted
let me be brave. let me forget. let me go.
i dont want to be distracted.
i want to be free.
not you.
not you.
not yet.
God, help me.
but i dont want to write. i want to talk. say it out loud --
i am distracted again. i hate it when it happens. my focus slips.
it causes me to stop writing. coz i feel that i am writing for someone else.
thus i want to see someone. i want to see them.
to tell them, to tell them, to tell them
these feelings of mine
the happiness that's seeping through
the joy
the worry that's gripping me
the sadness
the anxiety that's paralysing
the fear
the excitement that's making me dizzy with ecstacy
ohh.. all these feelings - and more!
they are just, extraordinary;
make me human.
i want to see you. i want to see all of you.
---
i am afraid of the moments when i get distracted
let me be brave. let me forget. let me go.
i dont want to be distracted.
i want to be free.
not you.
not you.
not yet.
God, help me.
ummah.. ummah.. ummah..
ummah.. ummah.. ummah..
ummatii..
ummatii..
ummatii..
ummatii..
ummatii..
*********************
A new year's approaching. 1430 hijriyyah muwafiqah 2009 masihi.
- take a deep breath ... release slowly -
ummah.. ummah.. ummah..
ummatii..
ummatii..
ummatii..
ummatii..
ummatii..
*********************
A new year's approaching. 1430 hijriyyah muwafiqah 2009 masihi.
- take a deep breath ... release slowly -
kak rufi sent a message via multiply about doing a survey regarding hijab. it's created by her friend, for research, so she's helping to spread the word.
then, in reply to her message, a sister sent a poem titled Object of Despair by Fahim Firfiray (Abu Omar). i like this bit very much:
Here's the full version:
Emma is a lawyer
And so is Aisha too
Colleagues going into court
At circa half past two
Its 1 O'clock right now
They grab a bite before the trial
They chat about this and that
Conversing with a smile
Aisha is in full hijab
With a loose all over suit
Emma's in her business wear
With accessories taboot
Emma's really quite bemused
At Aisha's godly ways
She looks Aisha in the eyes
And very firmly says
You're a smart girl Aisha
Why do you wear that across your hair?
Subjugated by "man"-kind
An object of despair
Take it off my sister
Let your banner be unfurled
Don't blindly follow all around
DECLARE YOUR FREEDOM TO THE WORLD
Aisha is amazed
But not the least bit shy
She bravely puts her milk shake down
And gives Emma the reply
My dear sister Emma,
Why do you dress the way you do?
The skirt you're wearing round your waist,
Is it really you?
Now that we've sat down,
I see you tug it across your thighs,
Do you feel ashamed?
Aware of prying eyes?
I see the way you're sitting,
Both legs joined at the knees,
Who forces you to sit like that?
Do you feel at ease?
I'll tell you who obliges you,
To dress the way you do,
Gucci, Klein and St. Laurent,
All have designs on you!
In the main, its men my friend,
Who dictate the whims of fashion,
Generating all the garb,
To incite the basest passion
"Sex Sells" there is no doubt,
But who buys with such great haste,
The answer is the likes of you,
Because they want to be embraced......
They want to be accepted,
On a level playing field
Sure, with brain and intellect
But with body parts revealed
Intelligence and reason
Are useful by and by
But if you want to make a mark
Stay appealing to the eye
You claim your skirt is office like
A business dress of sorts
Would we not laugh at Tony Blair
If he turned up in shorts?
His could be the poshest pants
Pinstripe from Saville Rowe
But walking round like that my friend
He'd really have to go
Why do you douse yourself with creams
To make your skin so milky?
Why do rip off all your hair
To keep your body silky?
A simple shower's all you need
To stay respectable and clean
The time and money that you spend
Is really quite obscene
Why do you wake up at dawn,
To apply a firm foundation,
Topped with make up and the like,
In one chaotic combination?
And if you should have to leave the house
Devoid of this routine
Why do you feel so insecure
That you should not be seen?
Be free my sister Emma
Escape from your deep mire
Don hijab today my friend
And all Islam's attire
Avoid all those sickly stares
Or whistles from afar
Walk down the street with dignity
Take pride in who you are
Strength lies in anonymity
Be a shadow in the crowd
Until you speak and interact
When your voice will carry loud
You're a smart girl Emma
Wear this across your hair
Don't be subjugated by "man"-kind
An object of despair
To use your very words my friend
Let your banner be unfurled
Don't blindly follow all around
DECLARE YOUR FREEDOM TO THE WORLD
then, in reply to her message, a sister sent a poem titled Object of Despair by Fahim Firfiray (Abu Omar). i like this bit very much:
Strength lies in anonymity
Be a shadow in the crowd
Until you speak and interact
When your voice will carry loud
Here's the full version:
Emma is a lawyer
And so is Aisha too
Colleagues going into court
At circa half past two
Its 1 O'clock right now
They grab a bite before the trial
They chat about this and that
Conversing with a smile
Aisha is in full hijab
With a loose all over suit
Emma's in her business wear
With accessories taboot
Emma's really quite bemused
At Aisha's godly ways
She looks Aisha in the eyes
And very firmly says
You're a smart girl Aisha
Why do you wear that across your hair?
Subjugated by "man"-kind
An object of despair
Take it off my sister
Let your banner be unfurled
Don't blindly follow all around
DECLARE YOUR FREEDOM TO THE WORLD
Aisha is amazed
But not the least bit shy
She bravely puts her milk shake down
And gives Emma the reply
My dear sister Emma,
Why do you dress the way you do?
The skirt you're wearing round your waist,
Is it really you?
Now that we've sat down,
I see you tug it across your thighs,
Do you feel ashamed?
Aware of prying eyes?
I see the way you're sitting,
Both legs joined at the knees,
Who forces you to sit like that?
Do you feel at ease?
I'll tell you who obliges you,
To dress the way you do,
Gucci, Klein and St. Laurent,
All have designs on you!
In the main, its men my friend,
Who dictate the whims of fashion,
Generating all the garb,
To incite the basest passion
"Sex Sells" there is no doubt,
But who buys with such great haste,
The answer is the likes of you,
Because they want to be embraced......
They want to be accepted,
On a level playing field
Sure, with brain and intellect
But with body parts revealed
Intelligence and reason
Are useful by and by
But if you want to make a mark
Stay appealing to the eye
You claim your skirt is office like
A business dress of sorts
Would we not laugh at Tony Blair
If he turned up in shorts?
His could be the poshest pants
Pinstripe from Saville Rowe
But walking round like that my friend
He'd really have to go
Why do you douse yourself with creams
To make your skin so milky?
Why do rip off all your hair
To keep your body silky?
A simple shower's all you need
To stay respectable and clean
The time and money that you spend
Is really quite obscene
Why do you wake up at dawn,
To apply a firm foundation,
Topped with make up and the like,
In one chaotic combination?
And if you should have to leave the house
Devoid of this routine
Why do you feel so insecure
That you should not be seen?
Be free my sister Emma
Escape from your deep mire
Don hijab today my friend
And all Islam's attire
Avoid all those sickly stares
Or whistles from afar
Walk down the street with dignity
Take pride in who you are
Strength lies in anonymity
Be a shadow in the crowd
Until you speak and interact
When your voice will carry loud
You're a smart girl Emma
Wear this across your hair
Don't be subjugated by "man"-kind
An object of despair
To use your very words my friend
Let your banner be unfurled
Don't blindly follow all around
DECLARE YOUR FREEDOM TO THE WORLD
just for the record
My First Time solat hari raya.. in my entire life. took place at masjid assyafaah, 8am on 9 dec 2008, bersamaan 10 dzulhijjah 1429H.
gembira sangat2!!
klw tahun2 sebelum ni, it's like 'errr.. tak heran'. rasenya, 2 tahun lepas or setahun yang lalu, baru tergerak hati nak gi solat raya. tapi tak gi.. tak ingat kenapa. bangun lambat or tak boleh solat.
masa eidilfitri tahun ni.. i was really looking forward to go to the masjid. i couldnt join the solat, but i didnt care. i wanted to go, coz i wanted to 'feel' the eid. when i woke up, mak, ayah, abang dah nak keluar rumah.. kelam-kabut jugak siap2, coz i wanted to witness the takbir and solat. naik mrt, turun kat sembawang, jalan kaki..
bila nampak ade pakcik2, orang2 on the way to mjd.. dgn baju kurung.. mcm touched gitu. then, i saw the masjid.. wah.. the wonderful feeling increased multifold gitu!.. bila nampak saf solat sampai ke gate masjid.. i was like *big-O* waaahhh... mcm gini rupenya.. touched lagi.
and so, the masjid grounds were all occupied.. so i could only watch from outside. lihat mcm2 orang.. anak-beranak lah.. dgn kawan2 lah.. tersenyum sendiri bila nampak the indians or bangladeshis with their costumes.. ade yang tak sempat gosok agaknya, or fresh from the plastic cover. hehe.. tapi, terhibur ah. you know, everybody was in the eid spirit, no matter what skin color you are. all under the banner of Islam. meraikan kemenangan.
okay, back to solat eidil adha -
solat kat dlm classroom. tgkt 3. tak kisah. yang penting, dapat experience takbir raya dgn jemaah lain, dan solat. for the first time lah sey. bayangkan!
oh, my fault though, i didnt read up on solat raya.. so i kinda 'rukuk halfway' mase imam takbir the second time. pfft.
after the solat ended, a sudden realisation.. that it was quick. i mean, i was still savouring the moment. tiba2, that's it, you know?
but still, the wonderful feeling like the one i felt time eidilfitri tu ada jugak. alhamdulillah..~
did i mention that the smell of the kambings was strong? ok, so, bro and i wanted to watch kambing kena sembelih. kita tunggu kat luar ah.. bukan kat compound masjid. tunggu punya tunggu.. mungkin dlm 45-55minit gitu kot. tgh tunggu tu, hujan gerimis.. then hujan betol2. wah! endure sey.. sempat jugak abang ambil kereta dari carpark kat kawasan perumahan, then park kat luar masjid.
nampak sgt pakcik2 kat area penyembelihan tu perasan ade dua audiences in the rain, under a big umbrella. gasak lah.. kita nak tgk jugak.
jeng jeng jeng!
bila the action dah nak mula, abang panggil mak yang sedang duduk dlm kereta. heee~ mak pon nak tgk. so.. ade pakcik yang dukung kambing.. bawak keluar dari kandang, letak tag. baringkan kat tempat penyembelihan.. urut2.. -
kita tak dapat tgk the actual moment/scene kambing disembelih with an unobstructed view :( sebab ade orang2 yang berdiri around the kambing.. hold the kepala and whatnot.. hmmm.. takpelah. tgk dari jauh pon jadi.
bila dah puas tgk, then kita berangkat pulang. and this was about 9.40am.
sukerrr! ^_^
gembira sangat2!!
klw tahun2 sebelum ni, it's like 'errr.. tak heran'. rasenya, 2 tahun lepas or setahun yang lalu, baru tergerak hati nak gi solat raya. tapi tak gi.. tak ingat kenapa. bangun lambat or tak boleh solat.
masa eidilfitri tahun ni.. i was really looking forward to go to the masjid. i couldnt join the solat, but i didnt care. i wanted to go, coz i wanted to 'feel' the eid. when i woke up, mak, ayah, abang dah nak keluar rumah.. kelam-kabut jugak siap2, coz i wanted to witness the takbir and solat. naik mrt, turun kat sembawang, jalan kaki..
bila nampak ade pakcik2, orang2 on the way to mjd.. dgn baju kurung.. mcm touched gitu. then, i saw the masjid.. wah.. the wonderful feeling increased multifold gitu!.. bila nampak saf solat sampai ke gate masjid.. i was like *big-O* waaahhh... mcm gini rupenya.. touched lagi.
and so, the masjid grounds were all occupied.. so i could only watch from outside. lihat mcm2 orang.. anak-beranak lah.. dgn kawan2 lah.. tersenyum sendiri bila nampak the indians or bangladeshis with their costumes.. ade yang tak sempat gosok agaknya, or fresh from the plastic cover. hehe.. tapi, terhibur ah. you know, everybody was in the eid spirit, no matter what skin color you are. all under the banner of Islam. meraikan kemenangan.
okay, back to solat eidil adha -
solat kat dlm classroom. tgkt 3. tak kisah. yang penting, dapat experience takbir raya dgn jemaah lain, dan solat. for the first time lah sey. bayangkan!
oh, my fault though, i didnt read up on solat raya.. so i kinda 'rukuk halfway' mase imam takbir the second time. pfft.
after the solat ended, a sudden realisation.. that it was quick. i mean, i was still savouring the moment. tiba2, that's it, you know?
but still, the wonderful feeling like the one i felt time eidilfitri tu ada jugak. alhamdulillah..~
did i mention that the smell of the kambings was strong? ok, so, bro and i wanted to watch kambing kena sembelih. kita tunggu kat luar ah.. bukan kat compound masjid. tunggu punya tunggu.. mungkin dlm 45-55minit gitu kot. tgh tunggu tu, hujan gerimis.. then hujan betol2. wah! endure sey.. sempat jugak abang ambil kereta dari carpark kat kawasan perumahan, then park kat luar masjid.
nampak sgt pakcik2 kat area penyembelihan tu perasan ade dua audiences in the rain, under a big umbrella. gasak lah.. kita nak tgk jugak.
jeng jeng jeng!
bila the action dah nak mula, abang panggil mak yang sedang duduk dlm kereta. heee~ mak pon nak tgk. so.. ade pakcik yang dukung kambing.. bawak keluar dari kandang, letak tag. baringkan kat tempat penyembelihan.. urut2.. -
kita tak dapat tgk the actual moment/scene kambing disembelih with an unobstructed view :( sebab ade orang2 yang berdiri around the kambing.. hold the kepala and whatnot.. hmmm.. takpelah. tgk dari jauh pon jadi.
bila dah puas tgk, then kita berangkat pulang. and this was about 9.40am.
sukerrr! ^_^
ohkayy... i found out that i did save three more smses from the 'ice kacang' guy.. saved them in my notebook, that is. actually, i had been wanting to write about the incident a long time ago.. but asyik delay.. and since my inbox tak boleh nak contain so much smses.. i jotted them down. go to the original post to see the edits.
****************
im in the last phase of my third year. Major Project is done and over with. honestly, it was the biggest obstacle ever. i just couldnt look into the future before 28 nov. 28 nov was the poster presentation, the last assessment for MP. finally, at about 3.10pm, i could breathe easily.
Wa 'ufawwidhu amrii ilallah...
even though i want so much to explore my options for the future, deep inside, i am really afraid. i know what im afraid of, but i just couldnt say it here. I can only pray and pray that the evaluators will mark leniently, yet, fairly. coz my conscience says i dont deserve to pass. Allah, help me.
now it's just problem-based learning (PBL). tak sibuk sangat. BUT! the unsettling matter above will always be in my mind. and i will only know of the result in 3 or 4 months. indeed, penantian adalah suatu penyeksaan!
****************
im in the last phase of my third year. Major Project is done and over with. honestly, it was the biggest obstacle ever. i just couldnt look into the future before 28 nov. 28 nov was the poster presentation, the last assessment for MP. finally, at about 3.10pm, i could breathe easily.
Wa 'ufawwidhu amrii ilallah...
even though i want so much to explore my options for the future, deep inside, i am really afraid. i know what im afraid of, but i just couldnt say it here. I can only pray and pray that the evaluators will mark leniently, yet, fairly. coz my conscience says i dont deserve to pass. Allah, help me.
now it's just problem-based learning (PBL). tak sibuk sangat. BUT! the unsettling matter above will always be in my mind. and i will only know of the result in 3 or 4 months. indeed, penantian adalah suatu penyeksaan!
generasi pelapis
seperti mana anti katakan dalam entry ini, kesian lah tengok remaja sekarang tapi kita kena ingat, dia mungkin tak seuntung kita yang dapat petunjuk Allah pada permulaan kita dilahirkan. terjaga sampai besar panjang ni. Itu juga bermakna amanah yang kita pukul lagi berat dari apa bro itu memikul.
the ummah needs more people like you. Jgn tawadhu' tak kena tempat ye. Jadi kena lah usaha siapkan diri jadi org tercontoh dan juga sediakan generasi pelapis yang bakal memikul amanah itu.
"Itu juga bermakna amanah yang kita pukul lagi berat dari apa bro itu memikul."
Hmmm... betul. *rase mcm kena slapped in the face* sigh.. the word "amanah" has this big weight in it. korang rase tak? cuba sebut perkataan itu sekali lagi: A-maa-nah!
Terima kasih, Tuhan.. di atas ni'mat Iman dan Islam..
"Jadi kena lah usaha siapkan diri jadi org tercontoh dan juga sediakan generasi pelapis yang bakal memikul amanah itu."
heheh, nak jadi orang tercontoh ni.. *tgk cermin*.. inshaAllah..
sediakan generasi pelapis?
YES!
tiba2 me terpikir tentang NI, dan terutama sekali, my juniors in alsagoff. in PRISMA.
-fikir panjang-
Thanks, Bro, for your comment. i appreciate it!
*********
two weeks ago, mase usrah kat mks.. anisah, sakinah n aiman were sharing about keadaan kat alsagoff.. hmm.. nampaknyer, mcm ade 'masalah' dgn adik2 kat sana. risau lah!
dari segi akhlak, mostly.
personally, im just soo afraid and worried pikirkan keadaan anak2 madrasah.. as the years go by. especially, in my alma mater. takut pengajian di madrasah tu, setakat belajar untuk exam. takut madrasah dah jadi mcm sekolah lain. takut madrasah tak dapat nak lentur adik2 ni menjadi muslim dan muslimah yang baik akhlaknya..
ade jugak ah, tgk2 blog a few juniors. hmmm.. sedih!
i dont want my juniors to think that madrasah tak boleh offer them the best environment, the holistic environment, for them to excel bila keluar nanti. ermm.. k, let me rephrase - i dont want them to think "ergghh.. bila lah aku nak graduate? aku nak masuk mainstream.."..
okay, that aside.
i want to talk about something else.
for more than a year now, i have this big urge to come back to school. to do something. to tell the teachers there, that madrasah plays a big, super duper role to didik pelajar2nye.
it's like, madrasah is the safe haven, you know? klw tak madrasah, mane lagi kite nak didik anak2 Islam tentang Islam? secara menyeluruh! and yes, and paling utama ialah mentarbiyah mereka dgn peribadi Islam. Subhanallah! bayangkan, my sisters and brothers from madrasah, graduate into the real world with personalities yang mengkagumkan dan berpegang pada prinsip2 agama. hmmm... 'Celupan Madrasah'
is it too much to ask for?
hmm.. korang rase, ade beza tak perwatakan seseorang yang dulu dari madrasah dan yang dari sekolah secular? for me, kite tak boleh nak rase.. coz, i was from a madrasah.. jadi, biased ah..
dari segi ilmu agama pon, i realise that madrasah has a lot to do to equip the students. for example, fiqh. cuba tunjukkan, bincangkan, isu2 kontemporari. tiba2 me teringat usul fiqh. ustazah selalu beri contoh 'dadah' dibandingkan dgn 'arak'. balik2 itu. afwan ust, ana tak berniat untuk memperkecilkan ust. cuma.. ana fikir, ada byk hukum2 yang nampak remeh, tapi sebenarnya, ialah sesuatu yang basic, yang sepatutnya, pelajar madrasah tahu.
klw kita gi website2 soal jawab tentang Islam.. kita akan baca macam2 kemusykilan agama. why not, organise an assignment for the students to solve a few questions.. dah tu, present kat kelas. dgn ini, pelajar boleh make use of the library kat tingkat 3 tu (byk buku2 'intellectual' kat situ) and learn research skills.. dapat improve presentation skills. ni dah mcm problem-based learning ah. dan. mereka dapat belajar selok-belok mencari dalil2 yang sohih, tulisan2 ulama', to support their answers.
another subject yang boleh diperdalamkan lagi skopnya ialah hadith. secara terus terang, kite rase tak salah, malah menguntungkan, klw pelajar2 didedahkan dgn contoh2 perbahasan tentang hadith2 dho'if.. bid'ah or ape2 ah.. this exposure kan, will at least give the students a sort of 'advanced standing' bila keluar nanti. lebih2 lagi for those yang tak continue into religious field.
anak2 madrasah kita perlu dibekalkan dgn ilmu yang substantial. not just theory, but practical.
klw quran dan tajwid pulak.. wah, ni penting! alhamdulillah.. one can see that those from madrasah dapat membaca dgn baik. tapi tajwid perlu dipertingkatkan lagi.
hmmmm... tapi, yang paling necessary ialah.. tarbiyyah rohani.. coz i think that kita masih lack kat situ.. pelajaran, ilmu is one thing ah.. tapi, kesedaran dlm diri masing2 tentang tanggungjawab kita sebagai seorang muslimah.. kesedaran.. kesedaran.. is another thing. need to instill the right values, to make them understand why we learn this, why we do that, guide them so that they can appreciate and experience for themselves, the beauty of Islam. okay, if this is too much, at least, get them to be aware that they need Islam, and Islam needs them.. so that in the future, ape pon steps they take, they will have Islam in their hearts and Allah as their common goal.
lagi2 klw dah masuk alam menengah.. this is where the spiritual development is crucial.. haiz~ teringat usrah.
k, i realise that im blabbering. ---
just to share, mase hari raya dgn kawan alsagoff.. kat rumah ust kamsinah.. i voiced out my concern.. that our students need more exposure.. to develop themselves in terms of communication skills, leadership skills and whatever else. pokoknyer, masa kat madrasah nih shouldnt be just about studying. this is where PRISMA can be utilised fully. and that, tarbiyah tu perlu. usaha dan peranan para ustazah dan ustaz sangat2 penting.. i want to tell them not to give up on these students.. merekalah murabbi.. and we need you, teachers!
some of my friends pon support jugak.. that madrasah needs to do more for the students.. tapi ape reaksi ustazah? ermmm... she nodded and all.. but she was not as enthusiastic as i thought she would be. perhaps i should go to ust zauwiah. maybe she would understand better.
so, mase usrah tu, me and kak mariam dah semangat.. i see the need for us, alsagoff alumni, to come together and help our juniors. i mean, we've seen the world, right? and im sure, a lot of us have different experience and expertise that we can share. (lebih2 lagi, kakak2 who are much2 older than me) it shouldnt be about us. it's about them. we want our juniors to be ready for the world. and not just like everyone else.. we hope to see our juniors become a full-fledged Muslimah. Mu'minah, Solehah, inshaAllah!
i said to kak mariam, "eh, klw adekan sistem usrah, bagus eh?" tak boleh disangkal, usrah merupakan satu platform yang sangat baik untuk membentuk adik2 kita. lebih efektif to focus on small groups.. hmm..
i also asked the trio, "kan PRISMA ada?" like i said, PRISMA is where our students can hone their organisational skills, etc. help bring colour to the school ah. since we dont have CCAs and we're mostly shut away from extra-alsagoff activities. but, they told me that the 'office' has lots of restrictions, although ust zauwiah supports the activities that PRISMA wants to do. hmmm.. i thought the school is more flexible now. k, this is just one side of the story. so, i guess, i may have to ask the 'office people' myself about this. or ask ust zauwiah. chett, liyana ni mcm berani nak tanya sekolah macam2 eh?
tapi kan, betol lah! the urge tu kadang2 kuat. rasa nak sangat berkhidmat kat sekolah balik. not as a teacher. but i want to do it through PRISMA. see, i told you, i still cant get over PRISMA even though it's been three years! haha tak lah.. it's just that, i see it has a potential.. takkan nama je alsagoff ade student body, tapi tak dapat gerak secara aktif mcm itmawat. i dunno how itmaj, asc and al-arabiah student council are doing. and i dunno if irsyad got their own student body. but what i do know, is that the other madrasahs got quite a number of activities/CCAs that the students can organise and participate in.
in summary, i hope to help my juniors, one way or another.
-the end-
p.s. haaahh.. ust sakinah nak proposal eh? ana takde proposal ah.. ni angan2. tgklah camne. do'akan eh? mudah2an, suatu hari nanti, kita (alumni) ramai2 dan guru2 dapat saling bantu-membantu to bring a positive change to the school, and the students. better still, let's spark a revolution!
the ummah needs more people like you. Jgn tawadhu' tak kena tempat ye. Jadi kena lah usaha siapkan diri jadi org tercontoh dan juga sediakan generasi pelapis yang bakal memikul amanah itu.
"Itu juga bermakna amanah yang kita pukul lagi berat dari apa bro itu memikul."
Hmmm... betul. *rase mcm kena slapped in the face* sigh.. the word "amanah" has this big weight in it. korang rase tak? cuba sebut perkataan itu sekali lagi: A-maa-nah!
Terima kasih, Tuhan.. di atas ni'mat Iman dan Islam..
"Jadi kena lah usaha siapkan diri jadi org tercontoh dan juga sediakan generasi pelapis yang bakal memikul amanah itu."
heheh, nak jadi orang tercontoh ni.. *tgk cermin*.. inshaAllah..
sediakan generasi pelapis?
YES!
tiba2 me terpikir tentang NI, dan terutama sekali, my juniors in alsagoff. in PRISMA.
-fikir panjang-
Thanks, Bro, for your comment. i appreciate it!
*********
two weeks ago, mase usrah kat mks.. anisah, sakinah n aiman were sharing about keadaan kat alsagoff.. hmm.. nampaknyer, mcm ade 'masalah' dgn adik2 kat sana. risau lah!
dari segi akhlak, mostly.
personally, im just soo afraid and worried pikirkan keadaan anak2 madrasah.. as the years go by. especially, in my alma mater. takut pengajian di madrasah tu, setakat belajar untuk exam. takut madrasah dah jadi mcm sekolah lain. takut madrasah tak dapat nak lentur adik2 ni menjadi muslim dan muslimah yang baik akhlaknya..
ade jugak ah, tgk2 blog a few juniors. hmmm.. sedih!
i dont want my juniors to think that madrasah tak boleh offer them the best environment, the holistic environment, for them to excel bila keluar nanti. ermm.. k, let me rephrase - i dont want them to think "ergghh.. bila lah aku nak graduate? aku nak masuk mainstream.."..
okay, that aside.
i want to talk about something else.
for more than a year now, i have this big urge to come back to school. to do something. to tell the teachers there, that madrasah plays a big, super duper role to didik pelajar2nye.
it's like, madrasah is the safe haven, you know? klw tak madrasah, mane lagi kite nak didik anak2 Islam tentang Islam? secara menyeluruh! and yes, and paling utama ialah mentarbiyah mereka dgn peribadi Islam. Subhanallah! bayangkan, my sisters and brothers from madrasah, graduate into the real world with personalities yang mengkagumkan dan berpegang pada prinsip2 agama. hmmm... 'Celupan Madrasah'
is it too much to ask for?
hmm.. korang rase, ade beza tak perwatakan seseorang yang dulu dari madrasah dan yang dari sekolah secular? for me, kite tak boleh nak rase.. coz, i was from a madrasah.. jadi, biased ah..
dari segi ilmu agama pon, i realise that madrasah has a lot to do to equip the students. for example, fiqh. cuba tunjukkan, bincangkan, isu2 kontemporari. tiba2 me teringat usul fiqh. ustazah selalu beri contoh 'dadah' dibandingkan dgn 'arak'. balik2 itu. afwan ust, ana tak berniat untuk memperkecilkan ust. cuma.. ana fikir, ada byk hukum2 yang nampak remeh, tapi sebenarnya, ialah sesuatu yang basic, yang sepatutnya, pelajar madrasah tahu.
klw kita gi website2 soal jawab tentang Islam.. kita akan baca macam2 kemusykilan agama. why not, organise an assignment for the students to solve a few questions.. dah tu, present kat kelas. dgn ini, pelajar boleh make use of the library kat tingkat 3 tu (byk buku2 'intellectual' kat situ) and learn research skills.. dapat improve presentation skills. ni dah mcm problem-based learning ah. dan. mereka dapat belajar selok-belok mencari dalil2 yang sohih, tulisan2 ulama', to support their answers.
another subject yang boleh diperdalamkan lagi skopnya ialah hadith. secara terus terang, kite rase tak salah, malah menguntungkan, klw pelajar2 didedahkan dgn contoh2 perbahasan tentang hadith2 dho'if.. bid'ah or ape2 ah.. this exposure kan, will at least give the students a sort of 'advanced standing' bila keluar nanti. lebih2 lagi for those yang tak continue into religious field.
anak2 madrasah kita perlu dibekalkan dgn ilmu yang substantial. not just theory, but practical.
klw quran dan tajwid pulak.. wah, ni penting! alhamdulillah.. one can see that those from madrasah dapat membaca dgn baik. tapi tajwid perlu dipertingkatkan lagi.
hmmmm... tapi, yang paling necessary ialah.. tarbiyyah rohani.. coz i think that kita masih lack kat situ.. pelajaran, ilmu is one thing ah.. tapi, kesedaran dlm diri masing2 tentang tanggungjawab kita sebagai seorang muslimah.. kesedaran.. kesedaran.. is another thing. need to instill the right values, to make them understand why we learn this, why we do that, guide them so that they can appreciate and experience for themselves, the beauty of Islam. okay, if this is too much, at least, get them to be aware that they need Islam, and Islam needs them.. so that in the future, ape pon steps they take, they will have Islam in their hearts and Allah as their common goal.
lagi2 klw dah masuk alam menengah.. this is where the spiritual development is crucial.. haiz~ teringat usrah.
k, i realise that im blabbering. ---
just to share, mase hari raya dgn kawan alsagoff.. kat rumah ust kamsinah.. i voiced out my concern.. that our students need more exposure.. to develop themselves in terms of communication skills, leadership skills and whatever else. pokoknyer, masa kat madrasah nih shouldnt be just about studying. this is where PRISMA can be utilised fully. and that, tarbiyah tu perlu. usaha dan peranan para ustazah dan ustaz sangat2 penting.. i want to tell them not to give up on these students.. merekalah murabbi.. and we need you, teachers!
some of my friends pon support jugak.. that madrasah needs to do more for the students.. tapi ape reaksi ustazah? ermmm... she nodded and all.. but she was not as enthusiastic as i thought she would be. perhaps i should go to ust zauwiah. maybe she would understand better.
so, mase usrah tu, me and kak mariam dah semangat.. i see the need for us, alsagoff alumni, to come together and help our juniors. i mean, we've seen the world, right? and im sure, a lot of us have different experience and expertise that we can share. (lebih2 lagi, kakak2 who are much2 older than me) it shouldnt be about us. it's about them. we want our juniors to be ready for the world. and not just like everyone else.. we hope to see our juniors become a full-fledged Muslimah. Mu'minah, Solehah, inshaAllah!
i said to kak mariam, "eh, klw adekan sistem usrah, bagus eh?" tak boleh disangkal, usrah merupakan satu platform yang sangat baik untuk membentuk adik2 kita. lebih efektif to focus on small groups.. hmm..
i also asked the trio, "kan PRISMA ada?" like i said, PRISMA is where our students can hone their organisational skills, etc. help bring colour to the school ah. since we dont have CCAs and we're mostly shut away from extra-alsagoff activities. but, they told me that the 'office' has lots of restrictions, although ust zauwiah supports the activities that PRISMA wants to do. hmmm.. i thought the school is more flexible now. k, this is just one side of the story. so, i guess, i may have to ask the 'office people' myself about this. or ask ust zauwiah. chett, liyana ni mcm berani nak tanya sekolah macam2 eh?
tapi kan, betol lah! the urge tu kadang2 kuat. rasa nak sangat berkhidmat kat sekolah balik. not as a teacher. but i want to do it through PRISMA. see, i told you, i still cant get over PRISMA even though it's been three years! haha tak lah.. it's just that, i see it has a potential.. takkan nama je alsagoff ade student body, tapi tak dapat gerak secara aktif mcm itmawat. i dunno how itmaj, asc and al-arabiah student council are doing. and i dunno if irsyad got their own student body. but what i do know, is that the other madrasahs got quite a number of activities/CCAs that the students can organise and participate in.
in summary, i hope to help my juniors, one way or another.
-the end-
p.s. haaahh.. ust sakinah nak proposal eh? ana takde proposal ah.. ni angan2. tgklah camne. do'akan eh? mudah2an, suatu hari nanti, kita (alumni) ramai2 dan guru2 dapat saling bantu-membantu to bring a positive change to the school, and the students. better still, let's spark a revolution!
menghairankan
at 12.44pm, last wednesday, I got an sms -
Assalam n Gd afternn!
:-)
im gg 2 sch(TP lah)
meet up 4-e ice kacang?
If segan,
Dun worry,i will tell u if there wont b anyone joining us k
What Time Sch ends?
pikir nak reply. but no, i didnt.
from that hour onwards, i was quite anxious, takut tgh jalan, tetiba ade orang approach ke.. "you're liyana, right?"mak kau~ if that happens, nak lari seh. anyway, i was still cool ah. i mean, chances are low lah kan. TP ni besar. ice kacang tu kat mensa canteen. and i wasnt anywhere near mensa.
okay okay.. meh, kite backtrack jap.
months ago.. while i was on SIP -
one day, i got an sms from someone.. asking me for my username and password coz this someone wanted to use the school PC.
kite mati-mati pikir that someone was my first-year junior. paham2 jelah, i cannot save anymore phone numbers in my handphone.
so, i gave the info and added something like, "waahh~ dah lama sey tak jumpa.. hope you are doing well in your studies.. and health.." basically, kitenye reply punye lah mesra. and betul lah, dah lama tak dgr khabar.
then, i got a reply -
Ur really swt u knw..
Thx 4 e well wishes n also sry 4 e late re.=batt flat
Hmm.. U too.. May u be at best of health always n also in studies, InshaAllah:-)
okay, and so i tot, "alahai~ baiknya adik ni" smiling to myself.
the next day -
Smiles..
Im gg to sch.. but will be gone at ard 330, so U 1-2 hav ice kacang @ mensa on me
Text me
I aint rich so only ice kacang.
:-) take care.
Assalam.
i replied something like, "..aint rich? =p.. im having my SIP.. in the west of singapore.. i can only have ice kacang with you when im back in november.."
oh man.. when i think back about how my sms sounded.. kasi shivers sey.. not that it was wrong. it was what happened next that stopped me in my tracks BIG TIME..
this 'junior' replied -
Nov?!
Wow, ur teachg me to Sabar..
Hmmm.. Wait, hold up!
I aint a sis ok!
Hehe.
U got e wrong person..
Im a bro.:-)
Did I go 4 a sex change?
NOPE!
OH. MY. GOD. i was ---------------- speechless!
and immediately, i was embarrassed. to think that i might have given an impression to this 'bro'; impression of ape? ntahlah... korang paham tak? tak paham takpe~
tapi pokoknyer.. i was super paiseh.. tak boleh angkat sey..
malu kat dia
malu kat diri sendiri
malu kat Dia..
Ya Allah!
terus rasa berdosa..
teringat balik kata2 mesra yang me tulis kat sms.
it was meant for a sister lah......!
*tutup muka dgn tudung*
anyway, i didnt reply the sms. -in state of shock-
two days later, on 7.8.2008 17.55hrs -
Hmmm..
Ur awfully quiet after e last msg I sent.
:-)
Take care.
Assalam.
i took a loOng time to compose a proper reply. and so, i sent him a looooonnnggg explanation. about who i had thought he was. how shocked, embarrassed and angry i was. how i shouldnt have replied in a 'very casual' way.. how improper i thought my use of language was, in my communication with a rajul. shocked coz i got the wrong person. embarrassed myself in front of myself, and Him (i cant remember if i added 'him' too). angry coz i had potrayed myself as a muslimah who tak jaga cara perbualannya dgn lelaki..
k k.. i know by now korang mesti kata, "relaks ah, liyana, kau tak tahu pe.."
tapikan.. ni mcm reflex ah.. seriously. rasa mcm hati ni kotor gitu.
then, the next day or few days later, the bro sent a long sms using sms.ac. heh.i didnt save it. cant remember exactly what he said.. some of it: "....relax.. no need to be embarrassed lah.. coz you dont know.. casual.. salah?.. i also communicate like that with my girl friends.. i dont know.. please teach me.."
some bits and pieces:
w a guy but i dun c whens the point u crossed ur line. Pls explain tt part.. hmmm if u say casual sekali is wrong, then i need to apologise 2..
cos im so casual 2. pls teach me my limits! cos i comm w all girls like so too! No need to malu to Him cos u dun knw=tak tahu maka tak dosa kan
i think i tried to explain about communication between guy/girl in Islam.. but i think he didnt quite get it:
on 22.8.2008 -
:-)
Mabuk kalau nak pikir camtu everytime.
But i think also depend on e other party.
If i dun mind, u dun hav to trouble urslf worryg.
Releks lah k.
pntg aper?
oh! the above incident happened in August.
then........ on the same day -
20.53 hrs
Assalam,
Hmm suggestion. Maybe on fri nites kan u can stay in sch n can watch movie at lib!
But let me apply alumni member 1st.
Can watch together?
Free lagi:-)
fuh! menyirap sey darah bila baca. nak kata meluat, tak sampai tahap tu ah.. truthfully, tibe2 kite naik seram. berani nye mamat ni..
pikir2 balik.. bersyukur sgt2 di atas kekuatan Iman.. i dont think i replied that sms. tapi dlm hati, nak sgt beritahu dia yang apa yang dia cadangkan tu salah dan nasihatkan dia. but at the same time, malas nak layan. dan takut nak layan. takut jadi perbualan panjang plak.. maklumlah, kena explain itu ini, klw dia tak faham2.
-------
begitulah kisahnyer..
yes, i do know the name of this person. apparently he is one of NI's new recruits. well, supposedly ah. but he has not come to any NI activities yet.
but! please note - i do not intend to shed a bad light on him. i do not want to judge him based on his smses, although im clearly not comfortable with it. He may be a good person. The common thing about him and me is that we both have weaknesses. so do the rest of humankind.
okay, ni sekadar untuk catatan.. 3 bulan, 3 tahun, 13 tahun akan dtg, bila tgk post nih, boleh ketawa sendiri kenangkan this incident. hehehe..
in the meantime, i'll just go on with my life as usual. =)
mmm.. just my last thoughts: mungkin mindsetnye lain; tak salah makan sama2, hang out, dgn kawan perempuan.. mcm kesian plak kat dia. bukan kesian, nak iyekan permintaannya. tapi, kesian klw dia tak tahu/sedar. klw pikir jauh sikit, kesian lihatkan keadaan mcm ni happening to fellow remaja Islam..
Assalam n Gd afternn!
:-)
im gg 2 sch(TP lah)
meet up 4-e ice kacang?
If segan,
Dun worry,i will tell u if there wont b anyone joining us k
What Time Sch ends?
pikir nak reply. but no, i didnt.
from that hour onwards, i was quite anxious, takut tgh jalan, tetiba ade orang approach ke.. "you're liyana, right?"
okay okay.. meh, kite backtrack jap.
months ago.. while i was on SIP -
one day, i got an sms from someone.. asking me for my username and password coz this someone wanted to use the school PC.
kite mati-mati pikir that someone was my first-year junior. paham2 jelah, i cannot save anymore phone numbers in my handphone.
so, i gave the info and added something like, "waahh~ dah lama sey tak jumpa.. hope you are doing well in your studies.. and health.." basically, kitenye reply punye lah mesra. and betul lah, dah lama tak dgr khabar.
then, i got a reply -
Ur really swt u knw..
Thx 4 e well wishes n also sry 4 e late re.=batt flat
Hmm.. U too.. May u be at best of health always n also in studies, InshaAllah:-)
okay, and so i tot, "alahai~ baiknya adik ni" smiling to myself.
the next day -
Smiles..
Im gg to sch.. but will be gone at ard 330, so U 1-2 hav ice kacang @ mensa on me
Text me
I aint rich so only ice kacang.
:-) take care.
Assalam.
i replied something like, "..aint rich? =p.. im having my SIP.. in the west of singapore.. i can only have ice kacang with you when im back in november.."
oh man.. when i think back about how my sms sounded.. kasi shivers sey.. not that it was wrong. it was what happened next that stopped me in my tracks BIG TIME..
this 'junior' replied -
Nov?!
Wow, ur teachg me to Sabar..
Hmmm.. Wait, hold up!
I aint a sis ok!
Hehe.
U got e wrong person..
Im a bro.:-)
Did I go 4 a sex change?
NOPE!
OH. MY. GOD. i was ---------------- speechless!
and immediately, i was embarrassed. to think that i might have given an impression to this 'bro'; impression of ape? ntahlah... korang paham tak? tak paham takpe~
tapi pokoknyer.. i was super paiseh.. tak boleh angkat sey..
malu kat dia
malu kat diri sendiri
malu kat Dia..
Ya Allah!
terus rasa berdosa..
teringat balik kata2 mesra yang me tulis kat sms.
it was meant for a sister lah......!
*tutup muka dgn tudung*
anyway, i didnt reply the sms. -in state of shock-
two days later, on 7.8.2008 17.55hrs -
Hmmm..
Ur awfully quiet after e last msg I sent.
:-)
Take care.
Assalam.
i took a loOng time to compose a proper reply. and so, i sent him a looooonnnggg explanation. about who i had thought he was. how shocked, embarrassed and angry i was. how i shouldnt have replied in a 'very casual' way.. how improper i thought my use of language was, in my communication with a rajul. shocked coz i got the wrong person. embarrassed myself in front of myself, and Him (i cant remember if i added 'him' too). angry coz i had potrayed myself as a muslimah who tak jaga cara perbualannya dgn lelaki..
k k.. i know by now korang mesti kata, "relaks ah, liyana, kau tak tahu pe.."
tapikan.. ni mcm reflex ah.. seriously. rasa mcm hati ni kotor gitu.
then, the next day or few days later, the bro sent a long sms using sms.ac. heh.
some bits and pieces:
w a guy but i dun c whens the point u crossed ur line. Pls explain tt part.. hmmm if u say casual sekali is wrong, then i need to apologise 2..
cos im so casual 2. pls teach me my limits! cos i comm w all girls like so too! No need to malu to Him cos u dun knw=tak tahu maka tak dosa kan
i think i tried to explain about communication between guy/girl in Islam.. but i think he didnt quite get it:
on 22.8.2008 -
:-)
Mabuk kalau nak pikir camtu everytime.
But i think also depend on e other party.
If i dun mind, u dun hav to trouble urslf worryg.
Releks lah k.
pntg aper?
oh! the above incident happened in August.
then........ on the same day -
20.53 hrs
Assalam,
Hmm suggestion. Maybe on fri nites kan u can stay in sch n can watch movie at lib!
But let me apply alumni member 1st.
Can watch together?
Free lagi:-)
fuh! menyirap sey darah bila baca. nak kata meluat, tak sampai tahap tu ah.. truthfully, tibe2 kite naik seram. berani nye mamat ni..
pikir2 balik.. bersyukur sgt2 di atas kekuatan Iman.. i dont think i replied that sms. tapi dlm hati, nak sgt beritahu dia yang apa yang dia cadangkan tu salah dan nasihatkan dia. but at the same time, malas nak layan. dan takut nak layan. takut jadi perbualan panjang plak.. maklumlah, kena explain itu ini, klw dia tak faham2.
-------
begitulah kisahnyer..
yes, i do know the name of this person. apparently he is one of NI's new recruits. well, supposedly ah. but he has not come to any NI activities yet.
but! please note - i do not intend to shed a bad light on him. i do not want to judge him based on his smses, although im clearly not comfortable with it. He may be a good person. The common thing about him and me is that we both have weaknesses. so do the rest of humankind.
okay, ni sekadar untuk catatan.. 3 bulan, 3 tahun, 13 tahun akan dtg, bila tgk post nih, boleh ketawa sendiri kenangkan this incident. hehehe..
in the meantime, i'll just go on with my life as usual. =)
mmm.. just my last thoughts: mungkin mindsetnye lain; tak salah makan sama2, hang out, dgn kawan perempuan.. mcm kesian plak kat dia. bukan kesian, nak iyekan permintaannya. tapi, kesian klw dia tak tahu/sedar. klw pikir jauh sikit, kesian lihatkan keadaan mcm ni happening to fellow remaja Islam..
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