kota raya + larkin = boleh tahan ah!

pukul sepuluh pagi keluar rumah.
naik bus 950 frm woodlands interchange.
naik turun pass imigresen naik turun pass imigresen naik turun.
sampai terminal sentral kotaraya.
so much for a modern view.
the weather was hot and it was 11 something.
jalan jalan jalan.
akhirnye sampai ke plaza kota raya.
bangunan pink.
dari jauh nmpk tingkap kt tingkat atas.
ade org tgh makan.
punyelah scenic!

nak cross the road.
picit button lampu trafik.
eh! tk hijau hijau pon.
jom, let's knock this thing off.
tak gune langsung lampu trafik tu!

masuk dalam.
oh~ ok lar.
naik tingkat atas sekali.
makan kat medan selera food court.
i ate mee hailam and drank air bandung.
sedap ar.
lame jugak makan.
lepas tu, gi first lady.

eksklusifnye!
tak payah beli kat situ sudah!
punye lah mahal!
design nye pon, entah!
tak minat!
then, turun lagi.

i got to buy a silverish tudung.
i like it immediately.
nampak mcm bidang 60.
tapi tak ah panjang sangat.
plus a 30 juzu' bacaan al-Afasi cd.
yey! :)
tp sayang tkde al-Ghamidi.
nvm.

kat situ pon ade kedai buku.
alahai~ i was so tempted.
oh well, too many books to browse.
n so little time.
again, nvm.

then gi solat zohor.
nice place.
guess the name of it?
masjid an-nur.
padahal masjid tu kt dlm plaza tu sendiri.
kenape tak surau je?
hmmm..whatever.

i saw satu kedai kecil yg jual keychains, frames etc
yg boleh tulis name tu..
i thought twice.
me dah ade keychain mcm gitu.
so tak payah lah.

sempat jugak beli kaya balls.
14 balls for just RM$2.00.
sungguh berpatutan! yum~

then, from there.
naik teksi gi larkin.
sbb me nk beli tudung labuh.
kat plaza tu plak takde!
ish~ waste time jek!
the first kedai yg kite pegi.
my luck!
coz ade tudung yg me berkenan.
color hitam.
nice fabric.

then, lalu satu kedai.
not really a kedai ah.
sbb dier kt luar.
ade meja kecil untuk hafalan tu.
alah, yg mcm kt dq n mks.
tp tk dpt nak tanye berape hargenye.

next stop, kedai jamu.
my mum.
dont ask me.

lepas tu, kedai tudung lagik.
me beli tudung labuh warne reddish white.
nice! :)

alhamdulillah.
i got what i came for.
next time.
more tudung.

anyway.
after that.
naik atas tpt mkn.
air jagung ice kacang sate.
plus lauk daging kurme.
yum~

last but not least.
beratur naik bus 170.
turun pass imigresen naik turun pass imigresen naik turun.
kranji sttn to admiralty sttn.
gi popular beli paper.
gi prime beli 2 botol sirap guava.
balik.
sampai rumah.

the end.

poem: His Words

In the Name of Allah begin every action
Obey, serve and worship Allah with devotion
Offer Salaah with humility an attention,
Read the Qur'an with understanding and comprehension.

Strive in Allah's way with Qur'anic inspiration
Let Allah's pleasure be our only aspiration
And success in the Hereafter,
Be our sole ambition.

Memorize Qur'anic quotations
Engage in Dhikr and Soul-Purification
Do Da'wah with wisdom,
Beautiful preaching and graceful persuasion.

There is no time now to relax
That we may Inshallah do in Paradise perhaps
Now be more concerned with earning Sawaab,
And maintain all norms of Hijaab.

In Religion there is no compulsion
At stake is your own Salvation
For the Truth stands out from error,
Make sure you do not regret later.

On the basis of color, wealth, or region
Let there be no distinction
In the Muslim Ummah let there be no division,
In the Qur'an will you find such injunctions.

Let us be One Strong United Brotherhood
Concerned about each others' welfare and good
Offering the needy and orphans food,
Over losses do not brood.

We follow the ways of beloved Prophet Muhammad
Sallallahu alaihi wasallam
Allah's Last and Final Messenger
The Most Sublime of all humans
The Most Exalted in Character.

We follow his Sunnah and Guidance
And do not cause on earth mischief or nuisance
Islam is a Religion of Peace
It's Attraction and Glory will never cease.

Do adopt the Islamic Way of Life
Be faithful to your husband or wife
In writing put all your contracts and agreements
Honor and keep all your promises and commitments.

Life after death is a certainty
Do not treat this life with laxity
Do not indulge in frivolous gaiety
And shun all obscenity and vulgarity.

Islam recommends virtues
Such as Honesty, Chastity and Charity
Do good deeds with sincerity
Almighty Willing you may attain eternal felicity.

On usury and interest there is prohibition
On trade there is blessing and divine sanction
Be honest and fair,
In every transaction.

Islam is here to reign supreme
However much the mushriks may scheme
This is neither utopia nor dream,
Righteous Muslims will emerge as the Victorious Team.

Allah's Oneness to all we proclaim
We seek neither wealth nor any fame
Allah's Pleasure is our only aim
Glorified be His Name,
May He save us from deeds of shame
And from hell's fire and flame.

Aameen! Ya arhamar raahimeen.


*taken from www.themodernreligion.com

describe yourself!

me
You're like me! The intelligent loner. You're shy
at times but friendly, and you are never weak
and always independent. You are incredibly
intelligent (wise beyond your years) and have a
talent for many things (sports, music, art).
You have a kind and warm personality and enjoy
the simple things. Like hanging out with
friends and watching movies at home. But you're
sometimes quiet nature makes you a bit of an
outcast and a mystery to people. No matter how
pretty you are or smart or athletic, you just
can't seem to break into the crowd and be
noticed. Don't worry, try to be more outgoing
and speak out when you have more to say. Don't
hide behind your books and sports and computer,
get out there and get noticed. You also have
deep desires in life and feel vunerable and
alone at times. Don't feel sad either, What
helps me to express feelings and dreams that I
can't say to people, is through my writting.
Maybe you should try.


What kind of girl are you? (with pix!)
brought to you by Quizilla



Assassin

You are an
assassin.

That means you are a proffessional and do your
job without mixing any emotions in it. In your
life you have probably been hurt many times and
have gotten some mental scars. This results in
you being distant from people. Though many
think that you are evil, you are not. What you
really are is a person, trying to forget your
pain and past. You are the person who never
seems to care and that is why being an assassin
fits you good. Atleast, that's what people
think. Even if you don't care that much for
your victims, you still have the ability to
care and to generally feel. It is not lost,
just a little forgotten. In crowds you tend to
not get to noticed, and dress in black or other
discrete colours. You don't being in the
spotlight and wish people would just leave you
alone. But once you do get close to someone you
have a hard time letting go and get real down
if you loose him/her.

Main weapon: Sniper
Quote: "The walls we build around
us to keep out the sadness also keep out the
joy" -Jim Rohn
Facial expression: Narrowed eyes




What Type of Killer Are You? [cool pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla



*************
Your wise quote is: "Fashion is a
form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to
alter it every six months" by Oscar
Wilde.You are a very sarcastic person with a
sharp tongue. You may not be the one always
talking, but your mind is nevertheless
critizing. You tend to have a cynical view on
life itself and be somewhat withdrawn with who
you really are. Society now is in your eyes
corrupted and you wonder how the world will
survive. And people are in your mind very
ignorant and blind to the reality.


What wise quote fits you?(pics) UPDATED
brought to you by Quizilla



******************
Your power is: Clairvoyance


Explanation: Your power is that you can
look into the future and see what is coming.
How far and long you can look is all depending
on your skill level. This can, as all powers,
be used in both evil and good. Even if it may
seem like a boring ability it is a huge
responsibility for the carrier, becase they are
constantly tempted with doing the wrongs deeds
(e.g. cheat on a test). It takes high morals to
not be brought down with it.

Therefor you fit with this power quite well.
You take responsibility and do what is the
right thing to do. This does not make you a
saint, since you're only human after all. But
it makes a trustworthy person and you are loyal
to camrades and/or team mates. In school you
were probably a good student. If you were
social varies from person to person, but most
clairvoyant people tend to prefer their own
company or that of close friends and family.
That is because you are wise and knows how to
treasure the reliable in your life, since you
know popularity can be a false element. You are
also not that big on taking risks and prefer
what is already explored. That is because you
don't like suprises, they can turn out bad and
then you won't be in control.
Negative aspects: Since you're always
doing the right thing and being trustworthy all
the time you can become frustrated. Also, all
that you carry on your shoulders may stress you
out. You need to relax to be in good mental
shape.




What Power is Compatible With You?
brought to you by Quizilla



Adventure
You need adventures.
Real life has been very boring for you and you
can't help but dream away. Nothing is exciting
or fascinating in your life and can't
understand why it all is so dull. You like
having fun, but are probably not a bouncing
person because of that. There is a probability
that you either like to read/watch fantasy or
similar genres, or have a creative side that
lets you release your fantasy world.


What Do You Need in Your Life? [dark pics]
brought to you by Quizilla




Your Heart is Red


What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla




Your element is Fire. Like fire, you have a hot
temper and you can be warm and loving as well
and angry and wild. It all really comes down to
what you are feeling. You have a lot of close
friends who you are very protective over, and
with your temper probably some enemies too. You
are not Miss Popular in school since you are
your own person and don't want to be forced
into behaving this or that way. You are the
untamed wild horse, the kind that everyone
wants to catch. But you don't want to be tied
down for the moment and just keep going with
your little crushes. Your will is strong and if
you set your mind to do something, you will
most likely succeed. But beware, your friends
may not always accept your mood-swinging
behaviour. Even if you don't mean to be mean,
they can still feel hurt. You just need to
start thinking some things through before you
do them, and not always jump in with so much
courage. One day you may be hurt because of
that, but then again, your element isn't fire
if you start to analyse situations before you
act. After all, your nature is to shoot first
and ask the questions later. Rate and message!


What is your element? [with pics + 7 outcomes + detailed answeres!]
brought to you by Quizilla



Lonlieness
You are sad because of the loneliness in your life


Why are you sad? [amazing pictures] For darker people
brought to you by Quizilla



Caring soul
Your soul is caring.
Other people are your concern, even if you
don't know them. If you see a person trip you
worry is he is okay. You put your loved ones
first and you're very mature. When someones
sick you're nurturing and always try to help
family and friends when failure strikes them.
You can be called the motherly one, if you are
in a group of people, which doesn't have to be
bad. Love is something that's already in you
and you have a lot to give whether you believe
it or not. Your friends probably love you very
much and come to when they need help since
you're reliable. People can feel secure with
you and generally like you.


How is your soul?(pics)
brought to you by Quizilla



zvnc
You're an Autum. You're much more laid back then
most and you're very comfortable in new
situations. You rather let things go with the
flow than try to change them. You have a lot of
close friends who love you because you can help
them with their problems. You're a very patient
person and it take a lot to get you rattled.
You're deffinately a lover not a hater. (If you
can't see tje pics, go to my homepage and look
near the bottom and find your result)


What season are you? (pics)
brought to you by Quizilla



Depressed
Your connection with darkness is through your
depression. Hated, sad and often feeling
lonely, there is only a few that appreciate the
real you. You tend to keep to yourself and away
from the world since you don't want to be hurt
and betrayed again. Music gives you the
understanding you need to get through, it's
your "therapy". Or you express
yourself through art or writing. Chances are
you're also an anti-social person, who only
likes being with close friends, if even that.
The world has finally showed it's true face for
you and you wish life wasn't this miserable to
live through. Maybe you'll find happiness in
the future, but right now you're just hiding
away from the world. Who needs people anyway?


What is your connection with darkness? (pics)
brought to you by Quizilla



Field of Innocence
Your Evanescence song is: Field of Innocence
Your "adult" life is full of despair,
hate and un-pure things. Nothing is good
anymore and you are generally depressed about
it. You remember the good times from your
earlier years: your childhood. Back then every
feeling was nice and you didn't have to face
the worlds cold heart. You wonder if you're
even the same person anymore since you've
changed so much. Sadly enough no one can
control time.

Where has my heart gone
An uneven trade for the real world



What Evanescence song are you?[many outcomes + wonderful pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla



HASH(0x8d53d50)
Alphonse Elric


Full Metal Alchemist Character Quiz
brought to you by Quizilla



Above
Life is great for you. You have power, you yearn
for more and can't live without it. You have a
need to boss everyone around you for your
personal pleasures yet you don't seem entirely
satisfied. Perhaps you never will. You need to
realise your still only human
and there are people as good as you. But why, when
you can have your own
little kingdom of slaves?


How do you see life?
brought to you by Quizilla



Broody
Your word is: Brooding. You are a true thinker and
often try to figure out the meaning of life,
why we are all here etc. You may not be so
social, and often think twice before acting but
those thoughts you have in your mind never stop
flowing in. Sometimes you can be so
concentrated you forget about other things that
you have to do. Don't change, this world needs
deep people.


What dark word represents you? (anime pics and 7 outcomes)
brought to you by Quizilla

counting the days..

there are about 6 days left till school reopen...i CAN wait! urgh! it turns out that i have somehow failed to accomplish many things during the 1 month that was given to me..n now, it's nearly gone! GAME OVER DUDE! YOU LOSE! haha!
n there are about 12-13 days left till i face some large audiences again..for 2 days straight! but, im not nervous, yet.
anyway, i bet that once school reopens, im gonna start running around right from day 1..oh well~~ what can i do? i just have to finish the unfinished business about PRISMA n all..i wonder when i'll be able to finally sit down..take a breath n study for the o level..it seems that something always starts right after another thing has been done...so, there's a loooong chain n i want it to end!
seriously, i dont think july will be a relaxing month for me..with the national day coming up..
hmmm...before this holiday is over..i think im going to sign up for the script-writing workshop..yeah, i think so.. :)

crossed off

i got a new wristwatch..alhamdulillah...$5.00..that's cheap! :D beli kt woodlands civic centre..
so, with that, another thing's has been crossed off my wishlist.
just now, tetibe je me terpikir nak buku harry potter, goblet of fire n order of the phoenix.. i already have the first 3 books..but then, biler fikir2 balik..tkpelah..tk payah!..hmm..bukan ape, duit tu boleh digunekan untuk perkare lain..n what i want doesnt really matter.. me sendiri nk restrict diri nie drpd jd materialistic! kite nk kene tahan nafsu nie betul2! tpkan, kdg2 me terfikir yg i never treated myself with something..klw ye pon..jarang sekali..n dgn perasaan ragu2..(klw chocolate tu lain ah! ;p)...oh well~ mayb someday i'll loosen up..but still..i cannot have what i want..coz im afraid that i'll be spoiled..*huge sigh*
basikal n discman pon me pikir berkali2..betul ke me perlukan bende2 tu semue?? surely, i can survive without those things..wlwpon terkilan sikit sebab tk dpt own one of those things..but again, tkpe..i wouldnt let my nafsu get the better of me..so, biler mak atau ayah offer nanti..me akan tolak!..bende2 nie semue temporary! tk kekal! membazir!
ya Allah! thabbit qalbi wa a'uzubika minnan nafsil ammarati bissu'..! ameen~

that thing you do~~

thn lepas, dlm kelas bahase melayu, kite kene bikin lirik from the words yg kite cari kt suratkhabar. perkataan dgn imbuhan di-i...wah~ pikir punye pikir.. at last, kite ambik rentak lagu the wonders-that thing you do..liriknye mcm gini:

kau...sangat dikagumi
dan engkau digemari dan disegani
oh si misteri

dan kau...boleh didapati
dan juga dinikmati oleh tok sami
wahai misteri

kau disyaki curi hati kami
oh si misteri
kelazatan dilalui
kenikmatan dikecapi
kau dipercayai oh cadbury!

OMG!! i feel like laughing right now! tgh tahan nih! teringat kk hairani nyanyi... kelakar! i mean, lagunye yg kelakar..hehe..haha..hoho..!

actually, ade 10 perkataan, tp mase tu kite tk perasan yg kite cume include 9 perkataan je...kelas dah habes baru perasan...oooOoOo..naseb baik tk kene potong markah! hehe ;p

saye nak bersyarah, awak dgr tau!

and so, the story begins...

i changed my text the night b4 the comp...cool huh? coz the 'taubah' one seemed long..more than 5 minutes..my new text consisted of some of the contents on my last year's text..so, it was ok..i managed to memorize it..though tk mantap..coz i was concentrating!

oh well~ alimah pon masuk jugak :)..n secare ringkasnye, kategori b persaingannye sengit..there were 12 participants i think...most of them were very good..they got the content..care penyampaian..semue ok..so, me dah bersedie untuk terime kenyataan bahawe me tkkn masuk peringkat seterusnye..siang2 me dah sedih dulu..alahai~ tkpelah

you know, biler me kt stage, satu brader tu btlkn mike..then dier kate 'good luck'..haa..terime kasih lah bro...tp saye tk rase 'gd luck' tu boleh tetibe je buat magic..it didnt even motivate me..

akhirnye..keputusan diumumkan..me dpt masuk peringkat akhir!! alhamdulillah! alimah pon same! kedue2 maarifian yg masuk dpt jugak! alahai~ kenape tk satu je?! ehem..jgn marah ye..gurau jek!..lagi 1 peserte yg dpt masuk peringkat akhir: seorg pelajar lelaki mewakili mjd ghufran..

kategori b alsagoffian due2 dpt masuk! tp, unfortunately..lagi satu peserte alsagoffian kt kategori b tk dpt...so, tgl me sorang untuk stuggle n strive.. i got tajuk "TANGGANG DAHULU, TANGGANG SEKARANG" giliran pertame! alahai~ seramnye!

tilawah plak: qariah..2 alsagoffian dpt melayakkan diri..husnah..zahidah..n satu budak primary nie..tk tau sape..kategori menengah qariah yg dpt masuk..semuenye mereke2 yg familiar..husnah, zahidah, atiqah, athirah..n lagi satu entah sape!

hmm..me tk nk cerite panjang ah..me balik dgn alimah, wardah n khairunnisa..sayang ah tk complete..klw ade maarifian, arabiah-ian n irsyadian..baru complete!

oh well..sape2 yg bace entry nie..lagi2 klw alsagoffian..harap jgn sebar berite yg ana masuk, k?? ana nk keep low profile! im serious ok? i hope you respect my decision.

and so, the story ends...

peek

berbelanje lagik!

me dpt beli sling bag! *all smiles*
at first, teragak2 jgk ah..sebab mahal...price range:$19.90 - $30 something.. yg converse tu lawa..$32.90..but my mum said ok..n yet, i didnt want to buy it..yelah..duit tu boleh digunekan untuk perkare2 yg lebih penting..lagipon, aqila beli beg jugak..mashimaro warna hitam..tahun lepas, dier dah beli beg mashimaro warne biru, tp kecik sikit...haiz~ so i tot, why waste money, tkpelah, me tk yah beli.. tp, at last, i bought a black polo sling bag..$19.90...oh well~~
bag mcm gitu (sling bag) bergune ah..sebelum nie me tk de bag tepi, melainkan bag sekolah n bag sarawak tu...bag sekolah, tkkn nk bawak gi mane2..nnti org ingat me patriotik sgt..klw ust katijah nmpk ke..habes kene soal!..bag sarawak pulak, walaupun boleh isi byk brg tp tk de compartments! semue brg kt dlm bag tu tonggang terbalik..
so, i have gotten one thing that is on my wishlist...others, like a new wristwatch n a bike..not yet! :)

pA$Ar Ma|aM..

semalam..lepas maghrib, me ikut my mum w/ my sis gi pasar malam dekat2 tnh lapang dpn admiralty mrt sttn tu..
well, i didnt expect, or more specifically - had high hopes, that i would get to buy things that i wanted..
it was ok i guess..beli makanan tu mmg ah! (WANTAN is my favourite!!)..dpt beli puzzle..500 pieces..for only 2 dollars! i bought more stockings - ke stokings for school (ehem! ehem!)..kt situ ade byk long pants..tp untuk lelaki...ish~..but i bought one..tklah labuh sgt!
but what made me happy...was i got to buy a keychain! (i like to collect keychains..) not the usual write-your-name-on-the-keychain keychain..tp..hmm, camne nk describe eh? nvm, i have the picture here..
kedai tu simple je, tk mcm kedai pon...just a display table, a workman's table..gitu2 je ah..me tgk org yg buat tu..i tot, bagus lah..buat keje dgn tekun.. klw bikin business nie dgn baik..insha allah..rezeki ade.." n "bagus lah org nie ade kemahiran dan dier gunekan kamahiran tu dgn care yg baik.."...
so, bikin my name, my sis's n my bro's..nasib baik name kite tk lebih dr 7 perkataan..so, each keychain costs $5.00..lame kene tunggu..sementare tu, me belilah mknn2 yg patut!...but when i got my keychain..i was disappointed! really disappointed! WHY?? sbb org tu salah eja my name...isk~isk~..i know, i know, mayb some of you out there think that it's no big deal..salah eja, tp still pronunciation same pe..but im quite sensitive about my name...baik dlm bahase rumi atau arab..salah letter ke tertgl letter ke...me tk terime!
hmmm...i tried to be 'redha'..n im still trying...as im writing this, my disappointment dah subside..but not fully...oh well...nvm..nvm.. people make mistakes..n this person did..even though i wrote my name clearly on his notebook.



see what's wrong with it??
me

Walking Away - Craig David

CHORUS
I'm walking away, from the troubles in my life
I'm walking away, oh to find a better day
(chorus X2)
I'm walking away

Sometimes some people get me wrong,
when it's something I've said or done
Sometimes you feel there is no fun,
that's why you turn and run
But now I truly realize,
some people don't want to compromise
Well I saw them with my own eyes spreading those lies and
Well I don't want to live a lie,
too many sleepless nights
Not mentioning the fights,
I'm sorry to say lady

CHORUS

Well I'm so tired baby
Things you say,
you're driving me away
Whispers in the powder room baby,
don't listen to the games they play
Girl I thought you'd realize,
I'm not like them other guys
Cuz I saw them with my own eyes,
you should have been more wise, and
I don't wanna live a lie,
too many sleepless nights
Not mentioning the fights,
I'm sorry to say lady

CHORUS(Repeat to end)

* notice the bold phrases?? *

frustrated!!!!

that's it! i cant do graph! linear > i can ah..but the nonlinear ones!! omg!! they're such a pain!!!

my main problem is using the curve ruler to draw the curve..i just cant get that the drawing right..! garisannye tk kene points-nye pon!! ARGH!!!!!! mcmane nk buat graph during the o level paper nanti!!! i can imagine mysself wasting 20 minutes on a graph's question!!! i'd rather find the solution by solving the equations using the formulae!!! n im damn sure i'll get a zero if i do just that!!

so..

I NEED MORE PRACTICE!! N I DONT LIKE PRACTISING CURVE-DRAWING!! IT MAKES ME SICK!!

i have to find a way to get around this problem..hmm..

p/s: drawing the curve manually?? i've tried..n it sure looked like i've cheated for not drawing the curve properly by using the proper stationery!

books..books..n more books!

i've never been to borders..kt orchard kn tu?? kinokuniya yg kt bugis pon, the first time i went there,a few yrs ago, setakat beberape minit je..mph kt citylink tu..belum pernah jejak...alahai..

so, my only refuge (is my word usage right?) is the popular bookstore.

biler balik dari esplanade td, singgah kt popular jap. tgk buku2 yg ade..haiz~ klw lah me ade duit..mcm nk beli 4 5 buku sekaligus! i browsed at the english fiction n non fiction section..but im more interested in motivational books..cant remember the books' titles right now..seriously, man..me angan2 klw dah kerje, tiap2 bulan beli 1 atau 2 buku..td pon me nmpk buku pasal paper art n origami..mcm best gitu!

ckp pasal buku n bhs inggeris..pagi td me bace section buku kt suratkhabar semalam (if im not mistaken)..dlm ruangan tu ade ckp pasal care2 untuk improve bahase melayu..dgn care membace novel melayu..ataupun antologi cerpen...hmmm ye tk ye..me rase dah tibe masenye me 'diversify' bahan bacaan yg me bace selalu..lebih2 lagi yg berkaitan dgn bahase melayu..selame nie..me sungguh tk minat nk bace ape2 buku/majalah bahase melayu.. ntah eh..tajuk2 yg ade semue boring2.. they dont meet my interests.. (dont ask me what my interests are!)..

my classmates pon..belambak yg minat bace novel cinta aje! ish~ seriously, mcmane nk maju?! hah? hah? cube ckp?! n so, biler me pegi library nanti..i'll try to borrow books by penulis2 melayu kite, tp bukan novel cintan-cintun! no way, man!.. *smiles*

b4 i end this entry..i'd like to give you a suggestion: if you want to give me something for my birthday..give me a book. you'll make my day! but, if you dont want, it's ok..van houten chocolates will do.. or masam-masin (or isit asam-sin?? or asam??) or a cheap wristwatch.. :) or better, a ticket (to n fro) to perth..coz i want to visit my friend there! hehe..

ana hamlatul qur'an

i was at mjd annur from ard 5 pm to 1050 pm...tgk musabaqah tilawatil qur'an kebangsaan singapura..hari nie prgkt separuh akhir kategori belia...first time since 2 years i guess..the 'normal' people i know were there..kak huda, adek beradeknye..husnah, zahidah, ishatun...n some people i recognise..sh mastura, atiqah..n a few peserta banin..

some of the participants are really talented...bace mcm pro gitu..tp tk kisahlah..yg lebih baik dan yg kurang baik, mereka semue tlh dikurniakan satu keistimewaan..syukran ilallah..i, myself, am fascinated by their recitation..ghibtah pon ade ;p..

lebih beruntung sekali klw seseorg tu tahu ilmu tilawah n tahfiz qur'an...mmg ade beberape org yg ana kenal yg mcm gitu...good for them..kdg2 me terfikir jugak..mungkin suatu hari nanti, biler me dah khatam you-know-what, i'll like to try bidang tilawah pulak...it'll be a bonus..insha allah..tp, buat mase skrg, ana rase talent ana dlm tilawah langsung tkde..hmm..belum cube belum tahu, ye tak?..

tpkan..biler me tgk peserte2nye..me terfikir..adekah mereke2 nie benar2 boleh dikatekan sebagai hamlatul qur'an? bukan me nk 'su'uzzon'..tp, from the what i have known n seen, some of them do not live the life of a 'qur'an bearer' (ceh! mcm torch bearer dlm olimpik pulak!)..even i, myself, am not living that life..honestly.. kdg2 me terfikir dose yg hamlatul qur'an yg lalai pikul...mereke telah mengetahui..ttp seolah2 tidak mengetahui..sometimes..i feel like a hypocrite..do i want to be a hamlatul qur'an or not??! what have i done to prove my choice?!

i try to think postively, though..at least, they've been chosen by Allah to have or do something that perhaps other people cant or dont want to do..that is, to be able to read the qur'an or memorize it with good tjwd, fasahah n beautiful melody..i remember a verse from qur'an..dlm surah fathir tk silap..jap..jap..i'll check.

oh! ayat 32 surah fathir:"kemudian Kitab itu kami wariskan kepada orang2 yang Kami pilih di antara hamba2 Kami, lalu di antara mereka ada yang menganiaya diri mereka sendiri dan di antara mereka ada yang pertengahan dan di antara mereka ada (pula) yang lebih dahulu dalam berbuat kebaikan dengan izin Allah.Yang demikian itu adalah kurnia yang amat besar."

this verse leaves a mark in my mind..hmmMmMmMMmm..

i really hope, golongan hamlatul qur'an yg sebenar tkkn hilang dek zaman..biar sedikit..kerane..sikit2 pon, mereka mampu menyelamatkan kite2 yg jahil ini..insha allah..me pulak..i dont want to classify myself as a hamlatul qur'an..bukan malu..tp me sendiri tk pasti klw me layak digelar sedemikian..

"man ana?"

it's amazing..it's fascinating..it's weird!

lots of things amaze me...when i think about them.

the early civilisation..when i read about the homo sapien..home erectus..homo habilis (duh! whatever the evolutionists say!)..n the homo sapien sapien (that is, our forefathers)..i imagine them wearing animal skin..you know..stone age people.. then when i combined what i read about nabi adam n those early people...i thought..hey! could it be possible?? i mean, i imagine zaman nabi adam org pakai baju mcm stone age people tu..their early technologies..then the dinasours..n the most interesting thing is..islam dah wujud?! haa! what do you think of that? ust suhana said something like, 'zaman nabi adam mcm gitu lah! tkkn diorang nk pakai baju mcm kite?! mungkin dinasour dulu bg diorang kecik2..yelah, org dahulu kale kn BESAR!' ye tk ye eh! sekarang kite anggap gajah, harimau, pola bear tu mcm biase..then 100 thn akan dtg, entah2 manusia akn jd lebih kecik..n binatang2 nie pulak yg jd dinasour!

when im in the bus..i look at the trees..it's amazing how an ordinary man, who is ignorant, may look at it as if it's just an ordinary living organism..not realising that trees, even a leaf, have complex mechanism going on in it..n that's how i see a tree, now that i've learned about photosynthesis, the transport system in a plant..etc..etc..it changes my perception abt this green being, you know..it's not that i want to brag "im now very knowledgeable!"..it's more like, with this knowledge, i appreciate more of Allah's creation..

it's good being an observer, you know..you'll be suprised at what you'll see..hmm..human behaviour..sometimes it's weird but fascinating...how thing's work..our own body..the never-ending galaxy...it's just soooo bizarre when you just think of it! the key question is why? why? WHY?

it's really a good thing i learn science..seriously..n talk about science..i've just remembered about math. you know what's amazing? it's the fact that how mathematicians long long long time ago discovered new formulae, new equations, new dimensions or solved tricky questions..oh man! what a genius! i really salute them! i just hope there's no record of any mathematician who died while cracking his head on how to solve an unknown number!

anyway, i've never heard of women mathematicians before, have you?

being unique

every single one of us is different from the other. this statement is true and will always be true. even identical twins are diferent persons..nothing's the same in this world..well, humans, that is..

best friends may say,"oh! we have lots of things in common." but there are differences which we have to accept n live with..there's a phrase,"like father, like son" yeah, of course, the son has the father's genes n perhaps inherits some of the latter's characters..but he's not totally like the father..coz he has the mother's genes n personality in him..get it?

each of us is a mixture of different personalities, physical features, IQ, EQ, colour, interests..et cetera..et cetera..some people may look 99.9% the same or have 99.9% similarities, but the fact is, there is SOMETHING that tell them apart..anyway, you cant make someone like you - or you cant be 'that' someone - even though you try very hard to impress him/her/them by acting to be like him/her/them.. it's so unoriginal..copycat..'pirated'..cowardly..untrue..

so, what im trying to say is that IM UNIQUE. n so are you.

im the product of my parents, my upbringing, the external environment..whatever..n i do change..humans cant escape from changes nor can they deny that changes exist..whether the change is in themselves or their surroundings..n once things change, you cannot hope n pray that everything will go back to 'normal' or say something like 'i want to see the old liyana again'..coz nothing can be the same twice..

as i grow up, i see things..i look, i read, i listen, i hear, i touch, i feel, i ponder, i wonder, i interpret n i make my own decisions of how i want to see the world n all of its elements, dilemmas..etc..based on my judgements which are influenced by all the factors above.

talk about maturity. people say that experience makes you more matured. i guess that's true...but it's not just that..if i dont experience what my mother, my brother, my friend, or my teacher experiences, does that make me immature or less matured? i believe empathy or imagining of being in someone's shoe also makes you more matured. i dont think getting yourself into dangerous relationships, after your sister was dumped, beaten or divorced, in order for you to live the same experience, is a smart idea. instead, you could learn from your sister's mistakes or pitfalls..the better your judgement is, the more matured you are.

as we read the magazines or listen to the radio, news etc, unconciously, what we read or listen to is shaping our personality..if you use your senses, it will make you think, again unconciously - perhaps, n when you start to think, you become more matured than before..or maybe 'stronger than yesterday'...or more alert n aware.. or however you choose to say..

i dont know what makes me write this piece of thought..i guess it was the testimonial that khadijah gave me..anyway, whatever i have written here is my opinion..but im not sure if ive presented it clearly, my command of english isnt very good..n i wouldnt want you to have a wrong impression whatsoever..

last but not least, im unique. n im learning to accept that. i hope you are too.

qiyam`05: episode 2

so, biler sec 3 buat diorg nye performance..i watched..but my mind was somewhere else...seriously, mcm tkde kuase nk teruskn qiyam..mcm nk balik je..mase tu blm bukak telekong lagik! ish~! then, ust zauwiah panggil me..oh well, i tot, here we go.. dier pon cakap lah...gini, gitu..hmm i cant really recall what she exactly said..but suddenly i just felt like i couldnt hold it much longer...though me tahan jugak...after that, i went to tpt letak bag sec 4..nk bukak telekong kot...then, ust zauwiah came to me...dier cakap lagik...this time, what i remember is this: ust zauwiah believe that khadijah gunekn me/my pangkat to trap me..bla..bla..bla..i wont reveal all the facts here..coz it's between me n ust zauwiah..but i just couldnt agree with her...i felt like telling her, there n then, that it doesnt matter what khadijah said of me! im the one to be blamed! after that..she went back to her place..n i finally broke down (actually, biler ust tgh cakap, me dah nangis dah...hais~ mcm mase kt program suai kenal plak!)..."kau pembohong, liyana! kau pembohong! kenape kau tk cakap ape2?! liar! liar!"my head screamed...

seriously, people, i dont make this up...it was what really happened...

i decided to turun bawah...i couldnt face the students w/ my face like that! me cuci muke...tarik nafas...haaahhh~~..tanye guru2 yg kt kantin if they needed any help...they said no..so i went back up to the hall..then duduk tgk performance sec 3 tu...biler dah habes...kak hairani approached me...she said something like:anti selalu kate share problems..so anti share ah antinye problem...oh! that was very sweet of her...but i just couldnt..i'll break down again if i open my mouth..it was hard for me to explain it to her..i was crying again..tp tk dahsyat ar..

then..to the ava room...me turun lambat2..biler nk masuk tu, terserempak dgn ust zauwiah..dier kate"awk pon same?"i said,"ye" as if i dont care...she was like..ya allah!..gitu2 ah..(ish~ gasak ar!)..hmmm...nasib baik ust katijah tkde..dier pergi jemputan..! so, the so-called lecturer would be the discipline mistress herself...i dont want to explain what she said...those who were in the same room as me (you know who you are) tau lah ape yg dier ckp..n who suddenly stood up? ME. i just cant take it,man..! she talked as if org lain yg salah...as if she was defending me..as if i didnt know that dijah n the gang memang dah plan nk keluar! i finally blew up! urgh!! krg2 yg terlibat taulah ape yg ana ckp...harap jgn cerite kt org lain ye!

ok, ok...perhaps my sudden reaction was stupid..or lame..or whatever that you people out there might say..but what's done is done...what's important is that i did what ive wanted to do..i.e to not be silent..i wasnt going to let people think that im a hypocrite, saving my own ass..!

after the mini drama in the ava room..the others pergi kantin..(naseb baik ade lagi mknn), ade yg gi dewan (coz diorang ahli panel forum sec 4)..whereas i went to the sec4 class..many kinds of feelings n thought in my head..thank god i didnt explode or ran away!..biler dah calm sikit..me gi toilet..biler nk keluar tu, khadijah masuk, dier mintak maaf..hey, dijah...tk payah mintak2 maaf...tkde ape yg nk dimaafkan...betul..krg tk bersalah ape2 pon kt ana..but please..jgn cakap ape2 or ungkit pasal nie lagi kt ana...i just want to forget ok? seriously, dijah, you dont have to feel bad about it..

since then..everything went back to normal...at least for me, i tried to pretend that things were ok, n eventually, my own self came back! :)...but i kind of avoided ust zauwiah..klw boleh, malas nk berbual dgn dier..i dunno why..but now, as im typing this entry...the negative feeling had subsided..so biler bukak sekolah nanti, i can talk to her w/o any bad thoughts.. :)

yeah, that's just about it..i've told my story..i hope ianye tk terbelit2..klw korg tk paham pon tkpe..as long as i, myself, know what i've been writing about..

a lesson learnt...

...really?? have i finally learnt the lesson n vowed not to repeat the same mistake that would jeopardize my image??? hmmmm...let's see...

date n day: 28 may 2005, saturday
event: arabic class, n after that qiyamullail 2005
venue: madrasah alsagoff al-arabiah
the story:...

kelas ust mohd 20 lebih org je yg dtg...yg lain samade tak tau langsung ade kelas, or they just simply ignored it! oh well..biarlah..back to the story: kelas habes pukul 10 pg...nk kene tunggu lagi 2 jam b4 the qiyam started. so, ape yg kite2 buat?
kite semue keluar drpd sekolah, except huda ayob. bagus huda ayob..pelajar contoh!.. si dijah n the gang mmg dah plan nk gi a.b. mohd dekat2 mustafa centre...ade yg ikut ishatun hantar brg..ade yg gi hajah maimunah..ade yg balik rumah, ade yg beli sketchbook..n ade gi indulge patisserie >> n who wud that be? me lah of course! mase tu terpikir nk rase kek/pastry yg ade kt situ...

me n 2 other accomplice balik dulu..mase keluar tu, me tk sangke pulak yg sekali satu kelas keluar! biler smpi kelas balik..bilik kosong!..haa! mesti krg tanye: tk kene tangkap ke? yelah, kite keluar selamba, masuk pon selambe! hmm..mase tu guru2 tgh meeting kt ava room..yg nampak pon cume bebudak sec 1 yg semmgnye bukanlah decent sgt! beberape minit kemudian, aishah kasim n her gang plus adilah balik...so kite pon lepak lah dlm kelas berbual2...

you know, it's really really fortunate that i didnt follow khadijah..

then pukul 11 lebih...mase tu me baru habes meeting dgn rakan2 sejawatan...one of my friends yg dah balik (ishatun dah balik dah!) told me that ust zauwiah dpt tau yg khadijah keluar!! n she demanded that khadijah jumpe dier secepat mungkin..she also asked: yang lain mane?! uh-oh! i tot, oh no! we're finished! tp cepat2 kite plan yg si khadijah setakat gi banquet je..n ramai yg ikut ishatun gi hantar barang kt mak dier lepas tu gi rumah khairun (the last part is not true!)..tp masalahnye, si khairun merayap, so klw dier talipon mak dier suro sepakat - mane lah tau ust zauwiah talipon?! - nnti mak dier marah plak, coz maknye tk tau yg dier gi merayap!so, ishatun gi try contact aszafirah...oh! dier bwk hp rupenye! naseb baik lah aku baik hati tk rampas..! hehehe..(tp, aszafirah kate dier tk bawak..oh well~)plus, ust tanye pasal khadijah je, so klw dier sorang kene panggil, kite diam2 je ah...cume, mintak2 dier tk ckp pasal kite semue..

i sat in the class..thinking..what am i going to say to the discipline mistress (ust zauwiah lah tu)..?! it's obvious that semue keluar n that includes me..! me! hmmm...mase keluar tu, me tk pon rase guilty..coz, setakat gi kedai kek dkt2 sekolah..lapar pe(padahal ard 8 something - b4 class - me dah makan nasi!)..tp what really hit me most is the fact that i didnt do my duty..that is, halang diorang from going out! what a gd, loyal, muraqibah huh? it's not really a feeling of "biler buat tk pikir, dah buat baru nk takut!"..no, it's not! i've been expecting-since the day i got selected-yang badge tu akn ditarik suatu hari nanti...im still counting the days..anyway, my head keep saying: qulil haqqa walaw kaana murran..

dlm pukul 12 gitu khadijah n the gang balik...naik teksi...berite disampaikan...well, some of us thought budak sec 1 yg leak cerite..sbb ust ade sebut 'informer'..so, immediately, dlm kepale terpikir budak sec 1..mule lah some of us tk tentu pasal marah2 sec 1, indirectly ar..but not me ok! i was being neutral..tk kisah lah sape bilang, yg penting kite dah di 'berkas'..if im not mistaken, some of us advised khadijah supaye stay low profile...selagi ust tk panggil, selagi tu diam2 je... tp, after register name, khadijah kene panggil..

ish! cerite nie panjang nah! penat me type!

khadijah told me ust zauwiah bwk dier gi pejabat...ust katijah marah habes! n so, khadijah ckp bukan dier sorang je keluar..yelah, it wud be sooo unfair if she's the only who got scolded n kite2 terlepas begitu sahaje..i dont blame her..kesian jugak kene marah sorang2...so, sebagai hukuman..kite kene berkumpul kt ava room mase rehat...tk mkn lah kite ye?..tp yg belen2 yg tk dtg kelas tu tk kene panggil ar..even though ust katijah marah jugak coz ramai sgt pelajar yg tk dtg!

hmmm...the qiyam...it was a bad start...suddenly, im moodless..i felt no joy, seriously!...sape2 yg perasan muke ana mase tu tau lah..tk tentu pasal sedih giler sey...memikirkan yg ana gagal untuk melakukn satu tugas yg cukup mudah... i should've berpendirian teguh...tk mudah terpengaruh dgn nafsu sendiri... i should've stuck to the rules..n i thought...me tk layak nk jd muraqibah..coz i just couldn't do it...i know, being a muraqibah will teach me to be more disciplined..but i have to sacrifice the fun n mischief of being a 16 yr old student

ok lah i think i'll here for now..dah penat ar... the next episod >> lagi drama!

r.U.m.O.r.S

Saturday, stepping into the club
The music makes me wanna tell the DJ, turn it up
I feel the energy all around
And my body can't stop moving to the sound

But I can tell that you're watching me
And you're probably gonna write what you didn't see
Well, I just need a little space to breathe
Can you please respect my privacy

Why can't you just let me do
The things I wanna do
I just wanna be me
I don't understand
Why would you wanna bring me down
I'm only having fun
I'm gonna live my life (but not the way you want me to)

[chorus]
I'm tired of rumors starting
I'm sick of being followed
I'm tired of people lying
Saying what they want about me
Why can't they back up off me
Why can't they let me live
I'm gonna do it my way
Take this for just what it is

Here we are, back up in the club
People taking pictures
Don't you think they get enough
I just wanna be all over the floor
And throw my hands up in the air to a beat like (what)

I've gotta say respectfully
I would love it if you would take the cameras off of me
Cause I just want a little room to breathe
Can you please respect my privacy

Why can't you just let me do
The things I wanna do
I just wanna be me
I don't understand why
Would you wanna bring me down
I'm only having fun
I'm gonna live my life (but not the way you want me to)

[chorus]
I'm tired of rumors starting
I'm sick of being followed
I'm tired of people lying
Saying what they want about me
Why can't they back up off me
Why can't they let me live
I'm gonna do it my way
Take this for just what it is

I just need to free my mind (my mind)
Just wanna dance and have a good time (good time)

I'm tired of rumors (rumors)
Followed (followed, followed, followed, followed, followed)
What they want of me
Why can't they (they, they, they, they, they) let me live
Take this for just what it is

[chorus]
I'm tired of rumors starting
I'm sick of being followed
I'm tired of people lying
Saying what they want about me
Why can't they back up off me
Why can't they let me live
I'm gonna do it my way
Take this for just what it is

I'm tired of rumors starting
I'm sick of being followed
I'm tired of people lying
Saying what they want about me
Why can't they back up off me
Why can't they let me live
I'm gonna do it my way
Take this for just what it is





<br /><bgsound src="C:\WINDOWS\Shared\Lindsey Lohan- Rumors.mp3"><br />

before i forget!

i got 12 mistakes for my balaghah paper...bukan 15 or more..alhamdulillah! n english? i got 34/50..orite ah tu...alhamdulillah..at least it's better than my ever-worst malay marks.. :)

n i got a nine-letter word, with a capital C, in my result slip...it was quite ok..setakat naik satu percent je drpd percentage CA1..but overall, it's definitely a no-no to me! i really want that SC..n not just a SC but a much higher percentage!!! i crave for that!!!

the june's holiday is here..n i still havent drew up my daily timetable..looks like my duties n chores are getting jumbled up! i better get organized before they get out of hands!

hmmm...i finally found a way to connect with THE ONE/you-know-who (voldemort???)...but i dont think things are the same as before...im moving on..

khadijah was the one who gave me the testi in class...i have a lot to say about that words of yours, dijah! im not angry or pissed, believe me.

test, testi, testimonial.

my eyes are already tired...but i insist on writing this piece of entry...
today, woke up ard 6 something..took my bath, solat, exercise jap, mkn jap, bace suratkhabar jap...then pukul 8, dah siap duduk depan qur'an..nk murajaah untuk malamnye..tp, sayang seribu kali sayang...baru beberape ayat je..mate dah terlelap...sampai pukul 12 lebih...fuyo! bagus betul!

at 2 something, i went to bio class...it was ok, as usual..there's nothing un-ok about bio class..n i dont really look forward (or excited) to be in that class..my feelings are static (huh??)..next week, bio exam..theory only...n i haven't studied..i dont think i remember the names, definitions, explainations..bla..bla..bla..typical me huh?

after bio class..i went straight to mks..konon nk ambik exam ar..i tot my memorization was quite ok - except for few last pages..but at last..i didnt take the exam..coz when i looked through the verses again n again..suddenly they all seemed foreign to me..! so, next week, insha allah..i'll try again!

n now, im typing this post...u know what i should've done?? S.L.E.E.P. or at least, do something else..oh well..

ok, about this post's title..hmmm...testimonials tell other people something about youself.. n perhaps, most of the time, it's true..coz it's told by people who know you.. so far, i've found 2 sets of testimonials in friendster that obviously show these 2 particular members are 'pandai', 'pandai', 'pandai', popular, gifted, talented...bla..bla..bla.. niwei, im kinda interested to read this kind of people's testimonials..to see how brilliant (or amazing, or fantastic..etc) they are in the eyes of their peers..hmm..im not jealous whatsoever..but if people drop me a testimonial, complimenting me this and that.. i wont accept it personally though i'll accept the testimonial (get what i mean?)..of course, it's their right to say what they want to say, n it's the truth..but...oh! i just dont know how to describe what's in my head right now...never mind! just ignore whatever that i've blabbered here..btw, if you guys intent to drop me a testimonial, no problem! just write down all the bad things about me ok? so, kesedaran tu sentiase ade...lagipon, kite kenelah hine diri sendiri ye? untuk muhasabah diri!

ok lah, me rase tu je me nk cakap buat mase nie...