gambar-gambar lama uh..

that's kak firza.. doing ermm... not sure, looking at the list of pax i think. nak print kot. anyway, im glad that i met her during RR'07!


starting from the one wearing pink tudung: kak idahyu, kak fadzillah, kak khairunnisa and kak khairunnisa. again, im thankful for these sisters ;)


from left: fadhilah, syazalyn and erny. huhu.. im not going to get bored saying this: im forever greatful to have met all the girls.. and for those whom i've already known before RR'07, to have got the chance to get to know them better *all smiles* indeed, this was one of the blessings from me being involved in RR'07..


tgh kemas barang2 kat dalam kotak, mainly badges and drawstring bags i think. fyi, those two things were the souvenirs for the participants.


the facis, representing the facis, who came for the post-mortem. yupz, they are discussing the matters to be raised during the session.


girls one side, the guys the other two sides..


haiz.. tak boleh angkat ah that i had to chair moderate the session. segan tau. segan!!! on a more positive note, the one yang pakai tudung dark purple is kak huda, my mentor. yesSah!!!


kak rufi (short for rufihaza) - i like her! turned out that she's my course senior kat TP.


ok, ni belum ready. ape-ape 'ntah~


dont have a better picture ah.. so, ni lah kita-kita yang hadir time post-mortem tu. ade jugak yang takde dlm gambar coz dah balik dulu. fyi, it was 11.15+ pm already =S

Exam timetable's out!

Yupz! 3 exam papers only.

BUT!

i still got tests, 2 of them i think, on the 18 feb week. =O

sepandai-pandai tupai melompat..

k, dah tiba masanya kau stop skipping lectures!

my ddct (drug development and clinical trials) lecturer knows i was absent from last friday's and today's lecture.

on top of that, i had failed to attend last thursday's prac project interview. i admit (i didnt admit to her lah.. nampak sah aku conteng arang kat muka sendiri!), it was my fault i didnt leave my house at 7.30am, instead, i left about 8am. one hour before my group's interview slot. cari pasal ke pe, liyana?! kau tau yang kau tak boleh make it if you go out at 8am. kau tau yang pastinya ada highway jam kat sengkang tu!

so yeah, there was a massive jam. one that even i didnt exactly anticipate - the bus was caught in it upon entering TPE. get it? at the entrance of TPE! imagine there and tampines interchange! how far can it get??!! and it was around 8.30 +/- am. so i had to sms my groupmate that i wouldnt be able to make it on time, and was likely to miss the interview. finally.. i reached tampines around 9.50 +/- am. lama kan? and dont think i wasnt upset.

ok, back to me and my lecturer:

so just now, after tutorial, i apologised to her (i had apologised to her on that interview day, but the time wasnt right - she was rushing to take attendance of the next group). she asked me why i was late. i said there was a massive jam. was there an accident? no, i didnt see an accident. i remember seeing on the 'noticeboard' that there was 'massive jam at pasir ris dr 12'.

and then, she confronted me, about my missing lectures. like, baru sekarang nak datang mintak maaf, when you got friday and today. yet, you were absent on both days. (she didnt say that exactly lah..) wah, dalam hati: camne dia tahu..? i was taken aback, alright. i could only say, yes, it was my mistake.

one student, she was on mc, and she's done the interview on friday.. (like, i got no valid excuse and i even missed lecture or didnt take the initiative to see her on friday or earlier today.. bad girl, me!) i could've been more lenient... what do you think i should do? i could mark you as absent (for that interview) and give you zero..

in my head, a sentence was forming: i am ready to accept the appropriate punishment..

then, she started to arrange with me the time i could take the interview.. this thursday.

finally, i said, thank you.. for your patience. i couldnt come up with a better word. patience?? still thinking of a more accurate, appropriate word.

she just smiled. i couldnt interpret what she was thinking.

i think, im on the verge of becoming a black-listed student in her book. better buck up, liyana~ you shouldnt miss any more lectures!

by the way, it turns out that students have to sign their attendance for ddct lectures. this procedure started last friday. oh.. kay.. *sedih jugak sbb takde orang beritahu.. tapi salahkan diri sendiri ah..*

of all things >-<

her friend says: ante tenggah istihara tentang apa ada org meresik ke
she says: hehe.... i wish!
she says: hehe
she says: tak ah
she says: istikharah ni boleh untuk mcm2 benda kan...
she says: so it's not about ade orang merisik
she says: huhu~
her friend says: yelah tau usik je mana tau kan
her friend says: kawan kita nikah dulu
she says: hehehe
she says: boleh jadi
she says: amiin~~
she says: hehehehehe
her friend says: ish ada org Tak sabar tu
she says: ape jek!
her friend says: seboK eh, if u busy Tak Yah reply continue ur work
she says: sebenarnye, kite tgh tgk cerita 'the craft'
her friend says: dah dia cakap boleh jugak dan amin kan sekali macam Tak sabar gitu
she says: hahahahaha
she says: boleh sabar...
she says: byk perkara perlu dibereskan sebelum kite nak masuk gerbang pernikahan
her friend says: memang ah tu sebab pernikahan walaupon hati inginkanyA tapi ana belum sampai menjadi wanita soleha impian ana. supayA tidak menjadi beban atau fitnah utk suami meneruskan jihad mereka
she says: huhu... wah~ berfalsafah sey~
her friend says: malu kita mana ada seorg yg banYak kekurangan
her friend says: masih mencari redaNYA dan cuba menjadi lebih baik
her friend says: insyAllah ia akan menjadi kenYataan tahun ini
her friend says: k ah... ana penat baru balik sebenarnYa bila nampak personal msg ante tu yg tertarik nak tegur
her friend says: assalamu alaikum wrb
her friend says: tc ana tido dulu ye
she says: okay
she says: ws

I wanna be Better!

there's a friendly match with NUS at NUS tomorrow. im thinking of going. hmmm...

and i managed to drag my lazy feet to tuesday's training -

my first time sparring after soo many months.

for your information, we cannot wear spectacles during sparring. not are we allowed earrings, studs, necklace, bracelet, hairpins and rings.. as for hairband, girls are encouraged to use a 'soft' one.

and to tell you the truth, not wearing specs during sparring really makes me insecure. like, i cant see enough. my vision now is worse than months ago. and with the IVP coming in march, i expect my vision to be worse, if not the same, as today.

but... i dont want to wear contact lenses.. scares me, man! eye infection, fungus and whatnots. plus, i only intend to wear them when i spar.. so for the rest of the days or weeks or months, the contact lens box is gonna lay somewhere among my stuff, alone, collecting dust! oh, poor thing..

-self-reflection mode-

i found myself getting lazier and lazier to attend trainings. in the graph depicting my attendance in 1st year and 2nd year, it shows a steep line going downwards.. and it's not rising back up, yet.

questioning myself, why arent you excited about tkd anymore? werent you the one who says that it is a platform to keep yourself fit, coz if not, you dont see yourself exercising those hands and legs?

ironically, when i successfully pushed myself to training, i felt good. good to be back. good to be 'revising' or improving this and that. i especially like it if that day got not so many people. yet, at the same time, i felt particularly frustrated and helpless (and blaming myself) if my kicks/posture are wrong, definitely way below my belt level.

well, that's because you skip training so much, liyana! and that is why your skills are like that!

so, isnt it time for you to buck up? dont you wanna learn the proper way? dont you wanna be good at it? you need practice, more of them! you know you do! and if you are so lazy to do anything about it, why dont you just quit?!

but i dont want to quit. another half of me wants to, though. (because of some reasons. maybe i'll share with you one day.)

for now, im hanging on. i think what is motivating me is the team temasek jacket. i want my jacket back! well, not that i'll be getting the exact same jacket that i wore last year.

you see, there's 'Temasek Polytechnic' sewn at the back of the jacket. unfortunately, it didnt occur to me to check the jacket thoroughly when i collected it. days (or few weeks, i think) after the competition, i returned it to the tkd captain. so that he can help me exchange for a new one. but he never did. hmmm... sabar je.. sabar je.. so now, im still waiting.

this year's IVP is on the 1st and 2nd of march. and my team still hasnt practised much on our pattern. and as for myself, im soooo not ready for sparring competition. arghh..! seram sangat2! i cant do back-thrust spontaneously. no confidence, mah~

yup. that's why im lacking: confidence; since i dont have enough practice, as compared to my tkd mates.

confidence is very important in any sports. and you dont just obtain it anywhere, anytime. after you got the skills, and after you use that skills, then you gain it.

hmmm... oh ya, i missed the january 6th grading. not enough time to practise the grading pattern, plus i was sick. haiz~~ hopefully, i can make it for the april one.

here's the pattern that my team is doing:

below is NTU team doing 'chil-jang' at the IVP NTU Open (pattern) 2006. they're damn goOd! what you're gonna see is an example of excellent execution - powerful, strong, and the same time, smooth~

Menghafal Quran ni sama ada mendapat Syafaat atau Laknat.. *

*guLP*

Ya Allah.. Masukkanlah kami dalam golongan orang-orang yang beruntung..

"Kemudian Kitab itu Kami wariskan kepada orang-orang yang
Kami pilih di antara hamba-hamba Kami, lalu di antara mereka ada yang mengania-
ya diri mereka sendiri dan di antara mereka ada yang pertengahan dan diantara
mereka ada (pula) yang lebih dahulu berbuat kebaikan dengan izin Allah. Yang
demikian itu adalah karunia yang amat besar. "

surah Faathir: 32 **

*dipetik daripada kata-kata Kowries 0706 dalam artikel 'Kisah Histeria di Pusat Tahfiz' bertarikh 2 Januari 2008. http://www.iluvislam.com/v1/readarticle.php?article_id=822

** Yang dimaksud dengan "orang yang menganiaya dirinya sendiri" ialah orang yang lebih banyak kesalahannya daripada kebaikannya, dan "pertengahan" ialah orang-orang yang kebaikannya berbanding dengan kesalahannya, sedang yang dimaksud dengan "orang-orang yang lebih dahulu dalam berbuat kebaikan" ialah orang-orang yang kebaikannya amat banyak dan amat jarang berbuat kesalahan.

i miss talking about religion. or about issues.. regarding life, current affairs, society, religious practices, philosophy, environment, nature, the future, history.

i miss indulging myself with ilmu. you know what i mean? ilmu, ilmu, ilmu!

i know damn well that what i learn in sch is ilmu, but no, no... what i really miss is ilmu agama.. belajar something for the sake for belajar something. ilmu that im familiar with.. more depth.. more width..

ilmu that can widen my perspective, stretch my mind, teach me to be more wise..

i need some scholarly discussions.. more of them. urgh!

and im really really grateful there's usrah. with my NI mates, and thfz mates.. although i missed two recent ones, 1 NI, 1 thfz..

now, usrahs and majlis ilmu (however informal, with my friends) seem more important than whatever trainings and ALPs. yupz.

Munajat oleh Rabbani

Tuhan
Kubisikkan kerinduan
Keinsafan
Pengharapan

Tuhan
Kubisikkan kerinduan
Keinsafan
Pengharapan

Tuhan
Kusembahkan pengorbanan
Membuktikan kecintaan

Bisikanku untuk-Mu
Munajatku mohon restu
Semoga cintaku bukan palsu
Pada desiran penuh syahdu
Gelombang lautan rinduku

Tuhan
Kubisikkan kerinduan
Keinsafan
Pengharapan

Tuhan
Kusembahkan pengorbanan
Membuktikan kecintaan

Munajatku dalam syahdu
Merindui maghfirah Mu
Mardhiah Mu dalam restu
Harapan tulusnya hatiku

Ku rindukan pimpinan Mu
Keagungan Mu dalam doaku
Kebesaran pada qudrat Mu
Ia membina ruhaniku

Tuhan
Kubisikkan kerinduan
Keinsafan
Pengharapan

Tuhan
Kusembahkan pengorbanan
Membuktikan kecintaan

Ujian kepahitan
Di dalam perjuangan
Padanya ada kemanisan
Ketenangan dan kebahagiaan
Padanya syurga idaman

Munajatku dalam syahdu
Merindui Maghfirah Mu
Mardhiah Mu dalam restu
Harapan tulusnya hatiku

Kurindukan pimpinan Mu
Keagungan Mu dalam doaku
Kebesaran pada Qudrat Mu
Ia membina ruhaniku

Tuhan
Kubisikkan kerinduan
Keinsafan
Pengharapan

Tuhan
Kusembahkan pengorbanan
Membuktikan kecintaan

i asked her about solat taqwiyatul hifz - is there a dalil for it?

she answered me in arabic, and immediately i realised she wasnt answering my question directly; she was telling me something else.

she knows.

"cara menguatkan hafalan...... sebenarnya... orang yang menghafal quran.... tak
boleh buat maksiat... sebab ilmu tu cahaya.. cahaya Allah tu tak diberikan pada
orang-orang maksiat.. penting bagi orang yang menghafal al-Quran buat solat
taubah.... lazimkan..."

that's more or less the gist of it, that i can remember.

i was suddenly solemn. another sign.

terkedu. but i wasnt in the right place and moment to reveal my feelings. tahan dulu k?

now, i can think and reflect.

it's still on my mind.

thank you, for the naseehah.. and thank You, for thru this incident i know You love me..

childhood songs

i'd like to start with nasyid.

ingat dulu2... (below 7 year oldnye memory ah.. so, quite fade) time arqam, me dgr nasyid2 by nadamurni and other kumpulan2 nasyid yang ditubuhkan under arqam.. ade yang 'ummiku sayang' album tu - i finally found out that they're called Soutus Sofwa (but i dunno if tu nama yang original atau nama baru selepas pembubaran arqam).

dulu2 tu, kite dgr kaset ah... sedap2 jugak lagunye. most of the cassettes dah tak tahu ke mana.. but few, me tak tahu camne nak dgr sbb the hi-fi system is faulty (which has the cassette player).

so, bila ada imeem ni, me tercari2 lagu2 lama yang pernah me dgr dulu..

ade satu lagu.. dlm album 'ummiku sayang'.. (there are others: dengarlah sayang, adik-adikku sayang) i really dont know sape or tajuk ape.. tapi liriknye asyik terngiang2.

selamat tinggal ayah dan ibu.. izinkan kami pergi dahulu.. mengharap restu juga do'amu.. kami pergi mencari ilmu..



=)

lagu from nadamurni:




and i think, the first moment that triggered back my 'memory of songs' was during a Saff 'R Us session kat perdaus hong kah. mase tu, tgh ade group discussion, then one of the brothers bukak satu lagu ni on his laptop. bila dgr je, terus hati ni berbisik, "eh! lagu tu! i had listened to it long time ago..!" mcm curious giler nak tahu sape nyanyi, tajuk lagu, mane nak dapatkan lagu tu..

when i asked the bro, lagu2 yang dia hantar salah uh.. tapi takpe, that was when i discovered 'selawat atasmu' by nowseeheart, and 'sa'ir' by, tak tahu sape.

i only know it starts with 'solla alaikallahu ya adnani' - tapi kan ade byk versi..

cari punye cari.. i found http://www.downloadnasyid.blogspot.com/ it was some time (a loOng time for me tho') before i found album 'untukmu rasulullah'.

i have satu cd 'untukmu rasulullah'.. tapi nombor 2 nye.. lagu tu dan beberape lagi lagu (yang pasti me recognise) ade kat cd nombor 1.

so.... click, click, click on the songs kat album tu, akhirnya:



oh, another nasyid that i had been painstakingly searching:





(to be continued)

lemme just ramble on...!!

k, i've LOTs to say... maklumlah, berminggu2 tak update kan... so, terpendam je kat pikiran ni..

TERM TESTS ARE OVER...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ya Allah.... betapa leganya hati ni~ rasenye, this is the greatest relief ever since i entered year 2. imagine that!

it wasn't a sweet ending, as usual.. nevertheless, knowing that tomorrow's the start of term break (albeit 3 projects at hand).. is hart-warming!

and... i dare to say that i did put quite an effort this week. alhamdulillah.. terima kasih Tuhan..! although... my spirits were going down, down, down as the last day of test (that is today) loomed.. susah betul nak maintain semangat kite untuk belajar kan? haa... sebab tu lah my last paper tak alright sgt.. sebab start belajar pukul 11pm+ the night before.. tu pon tak concentrate and info tak masuk sgt, sbb dah ngantuk. and, esok paginya baru sambung.. and my cpu agak slow (coz of the semangat turon and the distraction 'cepat lah habis..!!!')..

looking on the bright side, i was able to do bpharm calculations!!!!

oh yeah, have i ever told you that i find calculations hard? i cringe whenever there's calculations question.. dari first year sampai sekarang. yup, most of the time i dont understand the question.. and i dunno how to start solving the problem. hmm.. i wonder where my math power has gone to. *need more practice*

next!

aqila dapat 217 for her PSLE!! marha~ marha!! best kan? the highest kat sekolahnye (madr aljunied) is 240. dua orang. dua2 perempuan. gO GiRLsss~!!

and then, suddenly i thought.. "hmm... klw dulu aku ambil PSLE.. rasanye aku dapat berapa eh..?" talk about what if's!

another good news.. although agak terlambat is.... kamaliah got 3rd in her class!! yeSsA~ i know i've said this, but let me say it again: im PROUD of you, mate! *flashing my big toothy smile*

cerita lain:

1. i just discovered this website: http://www.iluvislam.com/ yesterday.. check it out gals! it was created by muslim lads from malaysia. and what's impressive that they, and their comm members, are students in overseas university!! muslims + malay + malaysia + europe + university =
future muslim intellectuals, insha Allah!!

oh, and what you get there:

Di sini anda berpeluang untuk menikmati pelbagai hiburan alternatif, info
universiti, koleksi artikel seantero dunia, perbincangan ilmiah, video islamik,
tv streaming, politik, perubatan dan kesihatan, cinta dan remaja, dakwah dan
jemaah, nama-nama anak anda, soal-jawab ustaz, ...dan banyak lagi!!

2. i was given the opportunity to help a sis mend a booth at masjid an-na'eem family carnival on 2 dec 2007. this sister is the woman behind http://www.nour.sg/ (promo ni!) and mewah apparel (located somewhere in bukit batok).. k, yang me betul2 nak promote ni is her designing service for customised badges, corporate stationeries, shirts (dry-fit), posters, etc etc etc.

and fyi, she was the main designer for Ramadhan Rocks 2007. yeah!

so, i know her from there. sehari sebelum RR'07 baru dapat bertemu 4 mata (or shall i say, 8? coz both of us wear specs. heh.) dgn Kak Hairani. your hard work is very much appreciated kak! =)

k, actually, what i want to share is....

remember i said i hadnt bought myself a gift in one of the previous posts?

pada hari tu lah, i got myself the Ultimate Birthday Gifts (macam betOl je ehh..). nak tahu ape? oh, lain kali kite cerita k? i want to post the pictures here too.. buat kenangan. *nak ambil gmbr then upload, tu yang leceh uh*

3. i've found some nostalgic songs.. you know, the songs that you heard/listened to when you're a kid. then you never heard it again.. but somehow, that memory is in the back of your head, and quite suddenly, one day, the rhythm just pops up, and you find yourself humming the tune, and if more lucky, some bits of the lyrics. but! you forgot what the song title is.. or who the singer is..

so, thanks to http://www.imeem.com/, i was able to retrieve these memories back!

amazing how 'playing music on your web' has evolved! just few years ago, i had wasted time and energy finding the html code to put song(s) in my blog.. even more ma fan if you have to 'upload' (i dunno what's the best word) the song of choice, like, manually, coz it wasnt available in any music codes sites. or even find the html for the music player.

now, everything's easy. the websites are there (music hosting webbies, eh? multiply.. flashfetish..).. all you have to do is upload the music (or just find it, like at imeem) and copy and paste the code. and voila!

videos also... youtube.. veoh.. haiz~ teringat dulu.. sedangkan nak letak lagu punyelah seksa, apatah lagi videos!

4. recently, i've been to 2 weddings.. got to see different perspectives... coming up, this sunday, my alsagoff senior, mariam hashim, is getting married!!

hmm... majlis2 nikah ni made me thinking, plus daydreaming, about my own wedding, calon suami (oops!).. hidup sebagai isteri.. bernikah muda.. even nama anak. what i prefer and what i dont. AND, the ultimate question whether i will live long enough to even get engaged. hah!

k, cakap pasal nama...

5. Mujahid ---- sedapkan bunyinya? with huruf 'jim' and 'ha' yang tebal.. bila sebut word tu.. seolah2 terlambang keteguhan, kesungguhan.. i had come to realise the depth of the word 'mujahadah' only this year.. around ramadhan.. when i reflected back on all the tribulations, emotional, spiritual, that i am facing.. and the word 'mujahid' appealed to me.

and kebetulan, masa hari raya yang baru lepas ni, i found out that my anak sedara (who's 21 years old) namanye muhammad mujahid. wow!

but i prefer simply, Mujahid.

another word that has been on my mind for quite some time is 'Dzulkifli'. yes, i prefer it spelled with 'dz'. sebutan kena tepat! i had thought of that name/word when i reflected on my personality. sometimes, i noticed that i was/is a 'pak sanggup'.. sanggup gi jauh to send a form to a friend, sanggup tunggu lama2, sanggup buat itu ini when nobody else did.. hmm... why did i go to the extra mile eh? kenapa menyusahkan diri eh? i remember my dad mentioned this behaviour of mine to me.. tak ingat lah bila.. but it kinda stuck in my head.

and i was reminded of makna 'Dzulkifli' dalam buku cerita kanak2 25 rasul (tak pasti colour biru atau bijau punye)... 'yang mempunyai kesanggupan'..

anyway,

Raihan and 'Ibaadurrahmaan' pon mcm sedap eh nama? tapi im not sure of the latter's meaning ah.. 'ibad tu, is it 'worshipper' or 'worshipping'..

klw nama perempuan plak.. hmm... belum dapat inspirasi..

6. it's been a long time since i write a sensible, mature post about issues. serious stuff.

hmm.. maybe it's my lack of knowledge. but more possibly, because expressing myself and my opinions in writing isn't my strength.

and yes... it's been a long time since i read something substantial. masuk internet, baca blog orang.. suratkhabar pon, BH je.. but not-so-heavy news je..

haiz~~ apa nak jadi! gotta change, gottachange gottachange~~




ape lagi nak share eh?

oh, another webbie: http://www.islamicevents.sg/ where events/talks/seminars/classes are advertised. it's new.. so spread about it k? so more people will know about this wonderful service the web creators offer!

let's support the efforts by our brothers and sisters! with the IT knowledge that we have.. must utilise it optimally for da'wah, and for the ummah!

Sabar di Hati

&

Syukur pada Wajah

1615hrs

my sister bought Indulge's tiramisu for me... that's very thoughtful of her.. thanks, aqila!

i had never tried tiramisu before... and i had been eyeing, sort of, the tiramisu from Indulge since the shop opened few years ago. lama eh? tak mampu ah... plus, tak sampai hati nak keluarkan duit to buy a small thing (in this case, food) at a price at which i can buy 2 muffins instead.

so, when i opened the fridge last night, and then, opened the box.. ooh! it's tiramisu~~

anyway, other than that, she bought my fav 'sweets' ah basically.. 2 pastries from Indulge, and chocolate fudge slice and peanut butter waffle from Prima Deli. *suker, suker, suker!*


and thank you, for those who wished me...

hmmm...

i'd like to think that i shouldnt expect anything.
and thus, i dont expect anything.
kena didik diri ah..
coz it's just one of the many days.
so there's no need for anyone to remember.
even myself, to an extreme extend.

nevertheless, i've yet to buy you anything..
just a du'a with the deepest hopes, and earnest feelings..
yang penting, you're happy k?
be strong, girlfriend!
^_____^

check these out! *for muslimah*

knee-length shirts.
button badges.
notebooks.
bookmarks.

whee~~ i like!

haiz~ kalaulah me ade duit untuk beli t-shirt2 tu... some of the colours and designs are nice!

1. http://deenarts.blogspot.com/
2. http://nurcahaya.wordpress.com/
3. http://www.anamuslim.com.my/
4. http://www.nour.sg/
5. http://www.seni-puteh.blogspot.com/
6. http://raiyanz.blogspot.com/2007/06/sambutan-tshirt.html
7. http://blogs.cjb.net/islamicbadges
8. http://www.wanitamelayu.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=13422 (bigger pictures of shirt designs)
9. http://muslimahtshirt.blogspot.com/
10. http://www.faeizonline.com/shop/
11. http://brotherhoodarts.com/
12. http://www.dapat.net/mms/actual/viewactual.aspx?Gambar=Gambarbaju1.JPG&Mesej=PRODUK%20TERBARU%20DARI%20TFM%20DESIGN!!
13. http://www.eelmoo.com/CasualWear/index.php?act=viewCat&catId=1

i need to..

- start going to tkd trainings and stick to them.

- start taking tkd trainings seriously, if im ever going to represent TP in pattern and sparring.

- start revising for term test, which starts on dec 10th. and it's a bunch of tests, not just one.

- treat myself something, to make myself happy.

- laugh less.

- be more friendly. i notice that i've been smiling less for the past, umm... i dunno.

- think how to help my family financially. holiday job?

- settle my choice of formal clothes for csas4 job interview test, although the test is more than a month away.


what else?

zina hati

an excerpt from an article/story:


"Betul, zina hati. Semua inilah yang Rasulullah jelaskan dalam hadithnya tentang bagaimana menghampiri zina tu. Anta boleh 'check' dalam Riyadahus salihin bawah bab larangan melihat wanita. Rasulullah bersabda, mata boleh berzina dgn melihat, lidah boleh berzina dengan bercakap, tangan boleh berzina dengan berpegangan. Kaki boleh berzina dengan berjalan ke arah tempat maksiat. Hati pula boleh berzina dgn merindui, mengingati dan membayangi si dia. Hakikatnye, macam mana pun anta buat, anta tetap tak dapat lari daripada zina hati."


[source]


mmmmmmmm.....

camera-phobia?

in one of my previous posts, i told you that i lost the family's new camera, right?

well, we've gotten a new one. malam raya~ my sister was pushing my parents to buy one.. and she insisted that it's gonna be hers. like, duh?

anyway, for my part, although i was kinda happy if we would have a camera for raya, i was still worried.. hmm.. had (and still have) a tingling feeling (sometimes, like chill running down my spine, or suddenly my hands become cold; and i would rub my palms).. uneasy, a bit scared whenever i thought of holding a camera. til now.

but, yeah, ended up my sis n mum went to buy a pentax 8.1 megapixels after maghrib at the photo shop near our house.

of course, i still enjoy taking photos *sukerrrr* but i still feel the repercussion of that fateful day.

and no, im not camera-phobic.

about me.

do you know, the time, the place, the situation, where you have to tell people about yourself (tell me/us about yourself?), or in your profile in webbies, such as friendster.. or even blog, you gotta describe your personality and whatnots..?

well, i've decided to write some things about myself.. in case i lose my memory one day. so my friends can show me my own blog, and specifically, this post, to help me refresh my memory.. so friends, take note, ey? but hopefully, nothing bad will happen to me..

whatever that comes to mind:

1. i dont wear jeans

2. im usually insensitive to people's criticism. i welcome feedback, comments, even potentially hurtful ones. i understand that some people find it hard to be tactful.. so rather than let them test their sentence-building skills, i prefer to let people shoot whatever they want.

3. my all-time favourite.. ermm.. im not sure what you call it - 'food' is very general, 'snack' sounds like it's not healthy - let's just say, 'snack'.. k, my all-time fav snack is roti bakar. yupz! loooovvvvee it. sampai bila2 pon me takkan naik muak makan tu.. ok, klw tak paham, bahasa inggerisnya ialah 'kaya toast'. huu.. dari kecil ku makan makanan ni.. teringat dulu2, whenever i went to ang mo kio library, bila singgah kedai kopi dekat2 situ (yang ada kedai maria mariana or something).. mesti order roti bakar. cuma, nak komen: KENAPE ROTI BAKAR SEKARANG MAHAL NAH??!! $1 UNTUK 2 KEPING ROTI (aka 2 triangles - 2 roti square, then dipotong shape triangle) APE SEHHH!!! ni bermakna kan... me kenalah bikin roti bakar sendiri...

4. another all-time favourite snack of mine is.. milo sejuk + biskut. whee~~ me suke sangat.. klw dlm satu hari, makan tu dua tiga kali pon ok. tak makan nasi tapi makan tu je pon ok. again, ni dari zaman kecil2 dulu.. n selalunya, me cecah biskut yang square shape (hup seng ke.. jacob's ke.. tiger ke..). *sedap nye~~*

5. i dont wear make-up. foundation, bedak, lipgloss and whatnots.. tak reti uh.. nak pakai celak pon, keberatan. pernah dgr yang pakai celak ni sunnah.. tapi sejauh mana kebenarannya eh? klw ditunjukkan bukti yang sahih, baru me pakai kot.

6. i like instrumental songs. usually, kinda new age, or soundtracks, or some foreign language songs. oh.. klw nak cerita ttg music, lain post je ah. plus, im trying to reduce listening to songs - im progressing well, cuma kadang2 tu, still dgr lagu jugak~.

7. ms. grammar. when i check documents, i would usually look for grammatical n spelling errors. takes time! other than that, im very particular about standard format.. i mean, klw marginnya senget, tak sama, bla bla bla.. meticulous but kadang2 leceh.. but, i cant help myself sometimes. heh.

8. 1 eye is bigger than the other. im not talking about the diameter of my eyes. im talking about the appearance. oh ya, and i wear glasses - my vision is slowly deteriorating everyday.

9. the only educational magazine that interests me so far is national geographic magazine. although it's been a while since i read a copy. and.... i borrow them from libraries. i only own one copy. bought it with my own money. some time this year, i think. you know the feeling, when you were a kid, and you wanted a certain candy (or whatever stuff lah), it costed higher than the average and you didnt have money. and you waited (for a loOng time) til you had enough money. and finally, you succeeded in getting your first candy, using your own money? you know, that personal satisfaction? yeah.. that was how it felt when i managed to buy my first nat geo mag. it costs $7.50, i think.

10. i had wanted a bicycle. i still do. though i dont really see a point of having one. yelah, bukannya boleh bawak gi east coast park ke mane2 yang jauh to ride it. and maybe, one day i may leave singapore. so takkan nak bawak dlm aeroplane.

11. i keep stuff for memoirs.. yeah, well, maybe im sentimental? or nostalgic? when i had to 'bongkar' my almari and reorganise my stuff last ramadhan coz i got a new almari, i realised that i have many things (cant think of an example now), small and medium, papers, souvenirs..

12. and i tend to hold dear to my stuff.. such as my old school shoes, and my broken umbrella, or my alsg school bag, or my old notebooks, or my old watches.. i have this mentality 'haiz~ benda ni dah banyak berjasa sey'.. berat betul hati ni nak buang...

13. im not the eldest of my siblings. some people may think im anak sulung, coz of my character.. umm.. sebenarnya, me tak paham sgt ah kenapa orang boleh pikir that im the eldest. ok, so, im the 4th child. or in another way, im the 2nd child. tak paham? tak pe.

14. i dont eat food from fast-food restaurants, except for fries, drinks, apple slice (from McD's), apple/pineapple pies, McD's hotcakes. i dont mind if my friends decide to eat at those places, i'll just buy fries (although sometimes, i may have to suppress my hunger). why, you may ask? oh.. ceritanye mudah je. cuma.. kite tak nak share kat sini. if you ask me directly personally then i may be able to explain it to you. but then again, maybe not. coz some opinions are best kept to self.

ok, i think that's enough for now. shall add on to the list if i remember more.

15. im a passive smoker.

16. i dont like missing the traffic light. you dont understand? it means, tertinggal traffic light... dah nak dekat lampu hijau, and yet im not near enough to cross.. err.. k, klw tak paham takpe.

17. a sweet tooth! chocolate, pastries, muffins, ice creams, desserts.. it's heaven! choices are limited, coz banyak nah yang tak halal. but im still thankful that there are chocolates and other sweet delights that i can eat and cake shops i can go to.. woo hoo~~

18. thriller films are ok, but horror (!!) films are a big NO-NO!! =S

self examination

this semester kan, im studying a subject called communications skill for applied science 4. in short, csas4.

andd...... the main topics for this subject are resume and cover letter writing... and job interview!

yupz, that's right. TP's preparing me, and my BMS year 2 mates, for the world. *chewah~ mcm bet0l je -.-"*

so i had to find 3 job ads, in the newpapers, job ad webbies... that suits your field of study or interest. initially, i found 3 that kinda alright.. err.. sebenarnye, 1 je yang appealing: management trainee for times bookstore. lagi 2 tu.. ade kena mengena dgn science ah.. tapi... maahh-cam tak minat.

so... the night (or shall i say, the weeeee morning) of the day that we were to submit the resume/cover letter.. i searched online. akhirnya.. me jumpe satu job yang boleh dikatakan suit my interest, my qualification (diploma) and field of study (biomedical science).

haaa.... ape interest gue?

well, i have this teeny-weeny hope and ambition in my head and mind that i want to pursue genetics studies. kinda fascinate me, although i got C for molecular genetics last semester.

so, the job ad that i found has to do with doing genetics stuff.

and then, apabila sudah ku temui pekerjaan yang ku inginkan... ku mula menulis (aka typed) resume dan cover letterku.

fuyo~~ resume tu senang jugak nak buat. cuma part 'achievements' 'skills' 'extra-curricular activities'.... errr... mcm segan nak tulis.

k, nak katakan, when writing the resume n cover letter, we had to pretend we've already graduated.

klw 'extra curricular activities' tu... taklah byk sgt kan...


eh, sidetrack kejap -


i actually looked thru my file of certs. then, i realised that i cant use practically most of my certs to show relevant achievements and whatnots. betul! regret? takde ah... i take the certs as memoirs of what i had done during my pri-sec-poly years. relevant ke tak, they're for my own personal.. umm.. keepsake?


k, back to the main story -

part 'achievements' plak, takkan nak concoct yang tak benar... dan yang sebenarnya, i couldnt find any achievements relevant to the job that im applying. pening~ pening~.. but then, ape kisah! this is just a draft resume n cover letter. i just put what i have uh... later, teacher can give feedback whether it's appropriate or not.

n then, 'skills' ade few sub-titles: biomedical skills, language, and leadership/organisational skills.

for the last one tu.... i put my role in RR'07. rase mcm bersalah gitu bila letak tu.. nama je 'head' tapi pada hakikatnya, i didnt lead. i just played as a team member. yes, i do realise that maybe, just maybe, this involvement in RR'07 would look good, or nice, in my future real resume. tapi macam.. macam bedek ah. k, senang cakap, i dont feel that i deserve to state '........ in ramadhan..... a youth development.... by... bla bla..', coz i feel that i never did enough to even speak of it.

k, next!

cover letter. waduh~~ leceh banget! i was like, fidgeting in front of my computer screen.. at 2 plus in the morning i think... or was it 1am+.. pikir, pikir.. cari ilham... browsed the sample letters that i have, browsed the net.. flipped thru the 'guide to writing cover letter' section in my csas4 handout.

finally, i managed to come up with a decent letter, albeit a not-so-persuasive-let-alone-impressive one.

yang penting, tugas dah selesai. and i can rest in peace. ^.^v

anyway..

bila tengah cari job ads... baru lah me sedar betapa susahNYA(!!) nak cari kerja yang sesuai dgn minat kita.. klw ikut qualifications, ade lah jugak some available positions.. tapi yang nak kerja ni diri kita... kita yang tanggung.

and i realised... 'eh? what do i want to do?? i dunno what i want to work as...!' ni memang soalan n pikiran cepumas!

dah tu... my tutor gave us 2 handouts: 'self profile' and 'job fit'.

yang 'self profile' tu kena letak kat my APEL portfolio.. im supposed to evaluate myself.. reflect.. and write my strengths and weaknesses in the paper. with neat handwriting. mcm mudah kan? oh, tidak~~~ i must support my strength with 'what i have done to show that i have this strength'..... leceh!!!! tak kuasa ah nak pikir2 balik.. rasanye, mcm takde pon! weakness plak... oooo... banyak nah~ cuma, takkan nak sebut semua kan? mesti yang relevant je uh..

oh, n i still havent finished the 'self-profile'.

'job fit' gotta correlate the job requirements with what i have.. eg, good team player.. so kena write ape2 yang dilakukan to show that im a good team player. this one, i think kena submit kat tutor some day kot. *belum habis buat jugak*

yupz.. basically, ni je yang me nak share buat masa ni. i think im gonna write a post that lists my strengths and weaknesses.. maybe i'll update it every time i remember 1 point or so..

what is your profession?!

found the track below while browsing imeem for soundtracks and whatever songs that came to mind.







which reminds me of something.
smiling to myself. amused.
*wink*